Since it's nearly the end of the year, here are a few thank yous to people who made my year 2008 worthy.
Friends Abroad
Lu Wee
Yes LW, you are first on the list. Surprised? I have to thank you for ALOT of things. Likewise you gave advice, lots of advice this year when I needed them most. And you are a really understanding friend, which makes you onto my list of special friends. Meaning you're a friend I do not want to lose nor to forget because I value you alot since you've kept me company online with our weird and yet funny and debatable chat convos. A great big thank you LW! Through our chat convos, you make my dim days to bright and sometimes you make me think over my decisions in life, like the transfering to brunei issue. I really thank you. For everything! haha You are really supportive as well! Thanks for everything this year!
Alvin Lee
Despite the less convos we have on msn, you are still my best friend no matter what. You've stood by me over many years of struggle and you've been there when I needed you the most. I thank you! and hope you have a blast this year 2009. Don't worry I'll still give you advice on your love life and such! haha
Hamizan
Zan Zan, you are rarely online yet you are my best friend despite you are rarely online. I have to thank you for everything, like keeping me company before I left for Philippines. I thank you so much. I really hope you do go online more often than usual so we can catch up on things like why the hell is dattebayo stop uploading naruto!
Geokyin
Ms Lameness! Princess Lame! You cheered me up so much when I'm down. With your lame jokes lah. I know you're been busy this year. And we get to chat for a while and yet make funny jokes and lame quirks to brighten up the day! haha I thank you!
Casey
Casey! haha thank you for being an understanding friend, and I know you've been busy throughout the year since you're tranferred to JIS. And as well we've been chatting for a while lately. So thank you for everything this year.
Lin Ji
LJ! I would like to thank you for everything this year! despite you've been busy lately. And yes we miss the good old times in ISB. Thanks for everything!
And now my new found Friends in the Philippines
KF
First of all, KF aka Hannah. [to readers: yes this the first you'll see me use her name]. I thank you. I really thank you! You are my only friend that I feel I am close to. And you've been there when I needed you. I really thank you for allowing me to forget my loneliness and homesickness. Because ever since I arrived in Philippines my world is clouded with loneliness and sadness plus homesickness from brunei. And when I met you, you cleared the cloud. I thank you for everything. Being with me and all! You are in my special friends list, likewise you are a friend I couldn't lose and forget because you helped me cleared the darkness of loneliness and all during my time here. I thank you for making my stay in the Philippines worth it. Thank you! And thank you for the korean food! And also teaching me Korean pronounciation too hehe! Kashammida!
Joy
First you always hit me so hard that it hurts! LOL hmm I thank you for being a really great friend! Thank you for being supportive and all! Thank you! I really do thank you! through our text convos, you've really help alot!
Justine
You are supportive and thank you for alot this year since I arrived in the philippines. Thank you.
Rhea
You are quirky, funny and fun! Thank you for brightening my day when it's dim and keeping me comapny when no one is there with me. Thank you so much.
Yes that's it. Only a few friends to be thankful this year.
I gotta go and lie down. I'm drunk you know! Three glasses full of red wine.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas!!
Christmas wishes in various languages:
Chinese - (Mandarin) Kung His Hsin Nien bing Chu Shen Tan (Catonese) Gun Tso Sun Tan'Gung Haw Sun
English - Merry Christmas
French - Joyeux Noel
Italian - Buone Feste Natalizie
Japanese - Shinnen omedeto. Kurisumasu Omedeto
Korean - Sung Tan Chuk Ha
Malay - Selamat Hari Natal
Spanish - Feliz Navidad
Tagalog - Maligayamg Pasko
Thai - Sawadee Pee Mai or souksan wan Christmas
Vietnamese - Chuc Mung Giang Sinh
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Tagging again!
Found on Facebook!
1.When was the last time you dusted your furniture?
Just now....christmas cleaning
3.Do you flat iron your hair everyday?
No.
4.Are you obsessed with the book Twilight?
I haven't read it yet...though its becoming over rated due to the movie release.
5.What are on the walls of your room?
Paint....white
6.Do you think that shy people are annoying?
Nope they are not. They're great to talk to. Because I'm shy and quiet myself once haha
7.Are you an organized person?
Yes, very organized
8.What time do you wake up on week days?
4.30 am during schooldays. Holidays 6am
9.What time do you wake up on week ends?
Saturday since I got class on that day, I wake up 4.30 and on sunday 6
10.Do you prefer paper clips or staplers?
Both are effective in their own way
11.How many videos on Youtube have you watched?
Not many...only when I need the urge to make myself laugh or maybe watch a music vid or whatever that may interests me.
12.Have you ever played the scary maze game?
LOL! was tricked! haha
13.Have you ever got so scared that you wet yourself?
No. Horror is boring [period]
14.Have you ever laughed so hard that you started bawling?
Maybe.
15.When was the last time you were in total bliss?
hmm cant remember
16.In your opinion, what is the worst song ever?
Crank that by Souja Boy. That is the worst hip hop song I have heard! sexual content you know within the lyrics! I cannot imagine why kids still listen to that song O_O
17.Do you eat dessert first?
Depends =)
18.What's today's date?
21st December...nearly christmas but kf hasn't answered my calls since yesterday, its about the christmas grocery tomorrow! =(
19.What do you find very interesting?
Anything that clicks my mind and catches my eye!
20.Do you wear goggles when swmming?
Yes
21.What do you like to do in your spare time?
I call, text, go out, go online, watch some downloaded videos (k/j-drama or movies or anime), play my games and other things keeps me active at least.
22.Do you think it's way too expensive at Abercrombie and Fitch?
where?
23.When you type "lol," do you literally laugh out loud?
Yes. sometimes hahaha is too short! hahahaha
24.When you type "rofl," do you roll on the floor laughing?
Used to
25.Do you have a tendency to procrastinate?
YES! Isn't obvious that I type on these tags!
26.The earth is round, correct?
It looks round but it feels flat...hmmm
27.What's your religion?
Catholic Christian
28.What was the last CD you bought?
Downloaded was Dark Horse By Nickelback
29.How many stands of hair do you have on your head?
I do not know...
30.Do you shave your armpits?
No
31.Do you projects on last minute?
Depends. If I procrastinated too much then maybe haha
32.What's up?
I would say ceiling or sky at times haha..hmm slightly worried why is KF not answering my phone calls..for three days since friday night! O_O
I am hoping my christmas will be great!
33.What do you plan on doing when you grow up?
Be a doctor for cardio or paedratic
34.Are you albino?
no
36.What internet browser are you currently using?
Internet Explorerer and Firefox
37.Are you good at photoshop?
Ish...but now i don't have photoshop
38.Are you confident or a ittle insecure?
Alittle bit of both
39.Is High School Musical 3 a movie that you wouldn't want to see?
Watched it. It was nice, very disney! =)
40.Do you like to play with dolls?
stuff toys...not barbie haha I only hold them and look at them when I'm thinking
41.Do you run with scissors?
No
42.Describe your worst nightmare.
My worst nightmare? Arguing with KF
43.Describe the best dream you ever had.
Meeting my dreamgirl [meaning unknown due to the blurry face]
Tags anyone!
1.When was the last time you dusted your furniture?
Just now....christmas cleaning
3.Do you flat iron your hair everyday?
No.
4.Are you obsessed with the book Twilight?
I haven't read it yet...though its becoming over rated due to the movie release.
5.What are on the walls of your room?
Paint....white
6.Do you think that shy people are annoying?
Nope they are not. They're great to talk to. Because I'm shy and quiet myself once haha
7.Are you an organized person?
Yes, very organized
8.What time do you wake up on week days?
4.30 am during schooldays. Holidays 6am
9.What time do you wake up on week ends?
Saturday since I got class on that day, I wake up 4.30 and on sunday 6
10.Do you prefer paper clips or staplers?
Both are effective in their own way
11.How many videos on Youtube have you watched?
Not many...only when I need the urge to make myself laugh or maybe watch a music vid or whatever that may interests me.
12.Have you ever played the scary maze game?
LOL! was tricked! haha
13.Have you ever got so scared that you wet yourself?
No. Horror is boring [period]
14.Have you ever laughed so hard that you started bawling?
Maybe.
15.When was the last time you were in total bliss?
hmm cant remember
16.In your opinion, what is the worst song ever?
Crank that by Souja Boy. That is the worst hip hop song I have heard! sexual content you know within the lyrics! I cannot imagine why kids still listen to that song O_O
17.Do you eat dessert first?
Depends =)
18.What's today's date?
21st December...nearly christmas but kf hasn't answered my calls since yesterday, its about the christmas grocery tomorrow! =(
19.What do you find very interesting?
Anything that clicks my mind and catches my eye!
20.Do you wear goggles when swmming?
Yes
21.What do you like to do in your spare time?
I call, text, go out, go online, watch some downloaded videos (k/j-drama or movies or anime), play my games and other things keeps me active at least.
22.Do you think it's way too expensive at Abercrombie and Fitch?
where?
23.When you type "lol," do you literally laugh out loud?
Yes. sometimes hahaha is too short! hahahaha
24.When you type "rofl," do you roll on the floor laughing?
Used to
25.Do you have a tendency to procrastinate?
YES! Isn't obvious that I type on these tags!
26.The earth is round, correct?
It looks round but it feels flat...hmmm
27.What's your religion?
Catholic Christian
28.What was the last CD you bought?
Downloaded was Dark Horse By Nickelback
29.How many stands of hair do you have on your head?
I do not know...
30.Do you shave your armpits?
No
31.Do you projects on last minute?
Depends. If I procrastinated too much then maybe haha
32.What's up?
I would say ceiling or sky at times haha..hmm slightly worried why is KF not answering my phone calls..for three days since friday night! O_O
I am hoping my christmas will be great!
33.What do you plan on doing when you grow up?
Be a doctor for cardio or paedratic
34.Are you albino?
no
36.What internet browser are you currently using?
Internet Explorerer and Firefox
37.Are you good at photoshop?
Ish...but now i don't have photoshop
38.Are you confident or a ittle insecure?
Alittle bit of both
39.Is High School Musical 3 a movie that you wouldn't want to see?
Watched it. It was nice, very disney! =)
40.Do you like to play with dolls?
stuff toys...not barbie haha I only hold them and look at them when I'm thinking
41.Do you run with scissors?
No
42.Describe your worst nightmare.
My worst nightmare? Arguing with KF
43.Describe the best dream you ever had.
Meeting my dreamgirl [meaning unknown due to the blurry face]
Tags anyone!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
I Think I and Imagine
Found this on facebook =D another tagging thingy.
1. Put your MP3 player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag your friends who might enjoy doing the game as well as the person you got the note from.
5. Add punctuation as desired.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Kiss Me Good bye - Angela Aki
WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
More than Words - Extreme
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Always be my baby - David Cook
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Letter to you - MCmong (Feat Lyn)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Ting Ma Ma De Hua - Jay Chou (HAHAHA)
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Surrender - Angela Aki
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Tears In Heaven - Eric Clapton
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
If today was your last day - Nickelback
WHAT IS 2+2?
Imagine - John Lennon
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
I miss you - Bum Soo Kim (korean song)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
An Jing (Silence) - Jay Chou
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Thankful - Josh Groban
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Start - Kim dong ryoul (korean song)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Kiseki (miracle) - Angela Aki (japanese)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Your Love Song - Angela Aki
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Lost - Michael Buble
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Way Back Into Love - Hugh Grant and Haley Bennett
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Uchu (heaven) - Angela Aki (Japanese)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
No Day But Today - Browneyes (Korean song)
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
With Me - unknown (Korean Song)
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Can I have this dance - Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Let it be - Brooke White
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
I Love You - VOS and Namolrafamily (eh?)
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
A korean song that I do not know the title...
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
You and I - Michael Buble
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
An Hao (Secret Signal)- Jay Chou
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
When You say nothing at all - Ronan Keating
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Home - Michael Buble
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Can't buy Me Love - Michael Buble
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
I Think I - Star
WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW?
Couple - Lee Seung Cheol
WHAT WILL YOU DO WHEN YOU GROW UP?
What a wonderful world - Michael Buble
WHAT WILL YOU DO IN COLLEGE?
Everything - Michael Buble
WHAT'S SO FUNNY?
Long Juan Feng - Jay Chou (how can this be funny?)
Tags:
Lin Ji
Lu wee
Anyone who passes by this private blog.
==========
Another one
1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 or more friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got it from.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
This Love - Angela Aki
WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
- Baek Ji young (Korean song I don't know the title)
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Wo Bu Pei - Jay Chou
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Way Back into Love - Hugh Grant and Haley Bennett
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Everything - Michael Buble
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Tears in Heaven - Eric Clapton
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Jie Kou (Excuse) - Jay Chou
WHAT IS 2+2?
I miss you - Bum Soo Kim
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
I believe - Shin Seung Hoon
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Sweetheart - Kim Youn Woo (aww haha)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
With me - unknown (korean song)
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
If you're not the one - Daniel Bedingfield
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
I think I - Star (one of her favs too)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
I Love you - VOS and Namolrafamily
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
A really sad korean song - Kim Hung Jung
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Korean song I don't know the title
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Way Back into love (korean version) Solbi and Kim Jong Wook
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
No day but today - Browneyes
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
If today was your last day - Nickelback
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
An Jing (Silence)- Jay Chou
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
More than Love - Sung Min Han (haha)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
I loved you - KCM
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Ting Ma Ma De Hua (Listen to mother's words)- Jay Chou
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Everyday like that - Browneyes
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Always be my baby - David cook
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Surrender - Angela Aki
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Letter to you - MCmong feat Lyn
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Lost - Michael Buble
WHAT WILL YOU RE-POST THIS AS?
imagine - John Lennon
HAHA
1. Put your MP3 player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag your friends who might enjoy doing the game as well as the person you got the note from.
5. Add punctuation as desired.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Kiss Me Good bye - Angela Aki
WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
More than Words - Extreme
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Always be my baby - David Cook
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Letter to you - MCmong (Feat Lyn)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Ting Ma Ma De Hua - Jay Chou (HAHAHA)
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Surrender - Angela Aki
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Tears In Heaven - Eric Clapton
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
If today was your last day - Nickelback
WHAT IS 2+2?
Imagine - John Lennon
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
I miss you - Bum Soo Kim (korean song)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
An Jing (Silence) - Jay Chou
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Thankful - Josh Groban
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Start - Kim dong ryoul (korean song)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Kiseki (miracle) - Angela Aki (japanese)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Your Love Song - Angela Aki
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Lost - Michael Buble
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Way Back Into Love - Hugh Grant and Haley Bennett
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Uchu (heaven) - Angela Aki (Japanese)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
No Day But Today - Browneyes (Korean song)
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
With Me - unknown (Korean Song)
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Can I have this dance - Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Let it be - Brooke White
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
I Love You - VOS and Namolrafamily (eh?)
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
A korean song that I do not know the title...
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
You and I - Michael Buble
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
An Hao (Secret Signal)- Jay Chou
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
When You say nothing at all - Ronan Keating
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Home - Michael Buble
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Can't buy Me Love - Michael Buble
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
I Think I - Star
WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW?
Couple - Lee Seung Cheol
WHAT WILL YOU DO WHEN YOU GROW UP?
What a wonderful world - Michael Buble
WHAT WILL YOU DO IN COLLEGE?
Everything - Michael Buble
WHAT'S SO FUNNY?
Long Juan Feng - Jay Chou (how can this be funny?)
Tags:
Lin Ji
Lu wee
Anyone who passes by this private blog.
==========
Another one
1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 or more friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got it from.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
This Love - Angela Aki
WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
- Baek Ji young (Korean song I don't know the title)
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Wo Bu Pei - Jay Chou
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Way Back into Love - Hugh Grant and Haley Bennett
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Everything - Michael Buble
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Tears in Heaven - Eric Clapton
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Jie Kou (Excuse) - Jay Chou
WHAT IS 2+2?
I miss you - Bum Soo Kim
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
I believe - Shin Seung Hoon
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Sweetheart - Kim Youn Woo (aww haha)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
With me - unknown (korean song)
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
If you're not the one - Daniel Bedingfield
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
I think I - Star (one of her favs too)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
I Love you - VOS and Namolrafamily
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
A really sad korean song - Kim Hung Jung
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Korean song I don't know the title
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Way Back into love (korean version) Solbi and Kim Jong Wook
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
No day but today - Browneyes
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
If today was your last day - Nickelback
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
An Jing (Silence)- Jay Chou
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
More than Love - Sung Min Han (haha)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
I loved you - KCM
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Ting Ma Ma De Hua (Listen to mother's words)- Jay Chou
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Everyday like that - Browneyes
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Always be my baby - David cook
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Surrender - Angela Aki
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Letter to you - MCmong feat Lyn
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Lost - Michael Buble
WHAT WILL YOU RE-POST THIS AS?
imagine - John Lennon
HAHA
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Tagged...
1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names
Starting time : 8:22pm
Name : Joseph
Sisters : 0
Brothers : 0
Shoe size : 9/10
Height : 5"11
Have you ever been on a plane : Yes
Swam in the ocean : Does the beach count?
Fallen asleep at school : The lovely clinc =) more than twice
Broken someone’s heart : Maybe I have but I don't know
Fell off your chair : yes...clumsy me
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : Yes...recently
Saved e-mails : Yes
What is your room like : Bed with pikachu, barney and pooh, small desk with things and books and mags
What’s right beside you: Books to revise and my desktop computer
What is the last thing you ate : Spring rolls and fish and veggies with rice
Ever had… Chicken pox : No
Sore throat : Yes
Broken nose : Nope
Do you Believe in love at first sight : Used to now no
Like picnics : maybe
Who was/were… The last person you danced with : Beach picnic i think it was..parents and relatives
Last made you smile : KF haha we were being immature and playful with my phone and also bought her ice cream
You last yelled at : can't reall recall
Today did you… Talk to someone you like : More like study with haha
Kissed anyone : Nope
Get sick : Yes
Talk to an ex : Nope
Miss someone : Kinda I guess
Who do you really hate: The person who copied my english accent
Do you like your hand-writing : Yes, nice and messy
Are your toe nails painted : Nope
Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in : the clinic's bed...so compfy
What color shirt are you wearing now : Blue
Are you a friendly person : Yes i am in a way
Do you have any pets : two dogs in a cage
Do you sleep with the TV on : Nope....used to was my laptop
What are you doing right now : Procrasinating...
Can you handle the truth : I can but it can be painful
Are you closer to your mother or father : Mother
Do you eat healthy : At times I do, but when you need a quick snack chocolate or nuts will help.
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex : I got no ex
If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to : Think for long hours and blog if I have to and sleep maybe
Are you loud or quiet most of the time : Quiet
Are you confident : Nowadays, quite confident
5 things I was doing 10 years ago
1) Playing playstation
2) Sleeping long hours
3) Watching television 24/7
4) eating sweets, junk and fastfood
5) Being a loner emo
5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1) Buy my own house
2) Donate some to charity
3) Give some to my parents
4) Spend on things that may keep me happy for a while
5) Bank it
5 of my bad habits
1) Sleeping late and waking up too early (4am)
2) Too giving and caring
3) Procrasinating too much
4) Lying
5) over eating
5 places I am living in
- what?
5 people I tag
1) Lin Ji
2) Alvin (if he does passes by)
3) Geokyin
4) Maple
5) any random visitor...clearly none
Another Tag:
Name 10 people you can think of right off the top of your head.
1. Alvin
2. Lukman
3. Lu Wee
4. Justine
5. Rhea
6. Geokyin
7. KF
8. Lin Ji
9. Hamizan
10. Joy
1. What was no.4’s first impression to you?
. Very childish
2. Do you have a crush on anyone up there?
. errmm...maybe? haha
3. What did no.2 say to you when he/she first saw you?
. he talked about x-men, omega red! I still remember!
4.What would you do if 1 and 3 fell inlove?
. HAHAHA I would laugh!
5. Where and when did you meet no.8?
. In ISB, year 12
6. Is 2 one of your best friends?
. Yea
7. Whose number 9’s best friend(s)?
. Me, Alvin and Lukman
8. Who on the above speaks English with you?
. All of them haha
9. Are you missing no.4?
. No haha
10. How is no.6’s attitude?
. FUNNY AND LAME! haha
11. Who does no.7 have a crush on?
. I do not know...but who knows who? haha
12. Who has a crush on no.3?
. Me? hahaha kidding, I dont know
13. Have you ever been inside number 8’s house?
. Yes, during chinese new year
14. Sleepover at anyone on the above’s house?
. None
15. Ever been in the same bed as any of the numbers?
. none
16. Who is no.5 to you?
. Study buddy and one of the ones I feel that we're quite close
17. Do you trust no.10?
. Yes i do
18. Ever kicked any of the above’s butt?
. Literally? No.
19. Ever seen no.1 naked?
. NO and I do not want to see
20. Who on the above is closest to you, (same sex)?
. hmm 1,2,9
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names
Starting time : 8:22pm
Name : Joseph
Sisters : 0
Brothers : 0
Shoe size : 9/10
Height : 5"11
Have you ever been on a plane : Yes
Swam in the ocean : Does the beach count?
Fallen asleep at school : The lovely clinc =) more than twice
Broken someone’s heart : Maybe I have but I don't know
Fell off your chair : yes...clumsy me
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : Yes...recently
Saved e-mails : Yes
What is your room like : Bed with pikachu, barney and pooh, small desk with things and books and mags
What’s right beside you: Books to revise and my desktop computer
What is the last thing you ate : Spring rolls and fish and veggies with rice
Ever had… Chicken pox : No
Sore throat : Yes
Broken nose : Nope
Do you Believe in love at first sight : Used to now no
Like picnics : maybe
Who was/were… The last person you danced with : Beach picnic i think it was..parents and relatives
Last made you smile : KF haha we were being immature and playful with my phone and also bought her ice cream
You last yelled at : can't reall recall
Today did you… Talk to someone you like : More like study with haha
Kissed anyone : Nope
Get sick : Yes
Talk to an ex : Nope
Miss someone : Kinda I guess
Who do you really hate: The person who copied my english accent
Do you like your hand-writing : Yes, nice and messy
Are your toe nails painted : Nope
Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in : the clinic's bed...so compfy
What color shirt are you wearing now : Blue
Are you a friendly person : Yes i am in a way
Do you have any pets : two dogs in a cage
Do you sleep with the TV on : Nope....used to was my laptop
What are you doing right now : Procrasinating...
Can you handle the truth : I can but it can be painful
Are you closer to your mother or father : Mother
Do you eat healthy : At times I do, but when you need a quick snack chocolate or nuts will help.
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex : I got no ex
If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to : Think for long hours and blog if I have to and sleep maybe
Are you loud or quiet most of the time : Quiet
Are you confident : Nowadays, quite confident
5 things I was doing 10 years ago
1) Playing playstation
2) Sleeping long hours
3) Watching television 24/7
4) eating sweets, junk and fastfood
5) Being a loner emo
5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1) Buy my own house
2) Donate some to charity
3) Give some to my parents
4) Spend on things that may keep me happy for a while
5) Bank it
5 of my bad habits
1) Sleeping late and waking up too early (4am)
2) Too giving and caring
3) Procrasinating too much
4) Lying
5) over eating
5 places I am living in
- what?
5 people I tag
1) Lin Ji
2) Alvin (if he does passes by)
3) Geokyin
4) Maple
5) any random visitor...clearly none
Another Tag:
Name 10 people you can think of right off the top of your head.
1. Alvin
2. Lukman
3. Lu Wee
4. Justine
5. Rhea
6. Geokyin
7. KF
8. Lin Ji
9. Hamizan
10. Joy
1. What was no.4’s first impression to you?
. Very childish
2. Do you have a crush on anyone up there?
. errmm...maybe? haha
3. What did no.2 say to you when he/she first saw you?
. he talked about x-men, omega red! I still remember!
4.What would you do if 1 and 3 fell inlove?
. HAHAHA I would laugh!
5. Where and when did you meet no.8?
. In ISB, year 12
6. Is 2 one of your best friends?
. Yea
7. Whose number 9’s best friend(s)?
. Me, Alvin and Lukman
8. Who on the above speaks English with you?
. All of them haha
9. Are you missing no.4?
. No haha
10. How is no.6’s attitude?
. FUNNY AND LAME! haha
11. Who does no.7 have a crush on?
. I do not know...but who knows who? haha
12. Who has a crush on no.3?
. Me? hahaha kidding, I dont know
13. Have you ever been inside number 8’s house?
. Yes, during chinese new year
14. Sleepover at anyone on the above’s house?
. None
15. Ever been in the same bed as any of the numbers?
. none
16. Who is no.5 to you?
. Study buddy and one of the ones I feel that we're quite close
17. Do you trust no.10?
. Yes i do
18. Ever kicked any of the above’s butt?
. Literally? No.
19. Ever seen no.1 naked?
. NO and I do not want to see
20. Who on the above is closest to you, (same sex)?
. hmm 1,2,9
Bad Luck?
Hearing a person that is not there calling out your name is bad luck.
Yes it is true, i heard twice today. And it was female voice.
I had a great exam but bad luck stricken me at night
why?
I hate my life in philippines..
despite how much I want make it coluorful with my tales in my blog
but I am speaking honestly here
I dislike my life (except for the joy of my friend) in philippines.
Why?
My grandmother is a tyrant dictator. Rules with the iron claw. Annoyingly starts arguements so quickly after you've done something nice to her.
She is not what I have known her as a child...I guess the truth hurts more right?
My aunts (mom's sister and sister in law) and uncle (mom's brother in law) and my two cousins (mom's sister's kids) are the most gossipy bunch I have ever heard and seen, and not very secretive of what i tell them. It is like no secret here is kept secret. I hate it all.
i know this not the usual post from me but today has urged me to type this down and show you that my life here is mediocore and on the verge of me wanting to transfer back to brunei.
I know the concequences if I transfered back, people in the uni i'm in will think I transfered because of KF BUT that is not the case! I have personal reasons why I WANT to transfer. My relatives may dislike me if I transfer back and lose their trust. But so what? it's my life and education life. I have no freedom like I do in Brunei, my freedom here is limited to nearly nothing. People who live in dorms are lucky because they have one thing I dont have...which is freedom! but unlucky due to curfew and other things.
I want my freedom back...like i use to have in brunei. My parents understands me better than they do.
And all this was because of me wanting to study tomorrow at school and my grandmother forbade me just because I dont have any subject of exam tomorrow....I RATHER BE IN SCHOOL THAN BE DISTURBED BY THEIR NOISE! Yes those calling voices are bad luck.
I hate my life at home here in the philippines...I know I don't have the national pride of my country anymore, I don't really bloody care if manny pacqiao really does win, I don't really care whatever achievement they have attained.
Please I want to be like I was in brunei.
Philippines is not what I have expected.
Yes it's my exam period and I'm not suppose to blog.
wish me luck for zoology.
Yes it is true, i heard twice today. And it was female voice.
I had a great exam but bad luck stricken me at night
why?
I hate my life in philippines..
despite how much I want make it coluorful with my tales in my blog
but I am speaking honestly here
I dislike my life (except for the joy of my friend) in philippines.
Why?
My grandmother is a tyrant dictator. Rules with the iron claw. Annoyingly starts arguements so quickly after you've done something nice to her.
She is not what I have known her as a child...I guess the truth hurts more right?
My aunts (mom's sister and sister in law) and uncle (mom's brother in law) and my two cousins (mom's sister's kids) are the most gossipy bunch I have ever heard and seen, and not very secretive of what i tell them. It is like no secret here is kept secret. I hate it all.
i know this not the usual post from me but today has urged me to type this down and show you that my life here is mediocore and on the verge of me wanting to transfer back to brunei.
I know the concequences if I transfered back, people in the uni i'm in will think I transfered because of KF BUT that is not the case! I have personal reasons why I WANT to transfer. My relatives may dislike me if I transfer back and lose their trust. But so what? it's my life and education life. I have no freedom like I do in Brunei, my freedom here is limited to nearly nothing. People who live in dorms are lucky because they have one thing I dont have...which is freedom! but unlucky due to curfew and other things.
I want my freedom back...like i use to have in brunei. My parents understands me better than they do.
And all this was because of me wanting to study tomorrow at school and my grandmother forbade me just because I dont have any subject of exam tomorrow....I RATHER BE IN SCHOOL THAN BE DISTURBED BY THEIR NOISE! Yes those calling voices are bad luck.
I hate my life at home here in the philippines...I know I don't have the national pride of my country anymore, I don't really bloody care if manny pacqiao really does win, I don't really care whatever achievement they have attained.
Please I want to be like I was in brunei.
Philippines is not what I have expected.
Yes it's my exam period and I'm not suppose to blog.
wish me luck for zoology.
Sunday, December 07, 2008
My Biography
[Warning, a very long post...updates at bottom]
Alas, The Loner’s Biography
Born on the year 1989 date of June 15th, I was born through cesarean birth in Bandar Seri Begawan, Brunei Darussalam in the hospital of RIPAS. Is the only child of this current Untalan family. And as well the eldest among the grandchildren of the Ognitas. How big was I? I was small, about the size of a coca-cola bottle. And I was named after a church in Quezon City, which was St. Joseph. With my birth it brought joys to my family of course, joys that they wanted me here. Just to say that, my mother wanted a boy and girl, and when I was born, my mother always tell me this very often she always say “I thank god for giving you as my child, because when I was pregnant of you I wanted a boy and girl but god gave me a son that looks like a girl”. Though it is uncomforting that when I hear that at first but as times pass and I look at pictures of the past, I do, and acceptingly agree, look like a girl. However, among these joys there was sorrow.
From the five attempts of giving birth, I am the only one that survived meaning that my mother had four miscarriages, two before me and two after me. Imagine that, I would have been the middle child of the family if they were born alive but this knowledge of the miscarriages is a scar on my behalf. Why? It hurts really knowing this that I am now forever alone in the family, with no brothers nor sisters when I need support and comfort, and as well the image of a dead fetus is embedded on my brain whenever I think about birth or subject of birth. But even with this sorrow, I know I am lucky to be born unto this world and that I am the only gift of god to my family.
As I grow through my years, I was the silent and shy boy in my childhood. I was playful too. Everyone around me was kind and generous as they are I still remember of them. I still do recall the event when I bit my cousin’s (Ashra aka Star) leg while in line at the sultan’s hari raya visitation. I still do remember the years of my younger days of watching endless Disney movies and cartoons which I became fond of. And I was know as Pooh bear by my parents because he is and still is my favorite character of all Disney characters and as well my size which they say I resemble him.
As I enter kindergarten and reception, I was playful as I was and joking kind yet caused some little trouble to my fellow classmates and teachers. During those years I remember my childhood friend and god-cousin (meaning my godparent’s child), her name was Nikki. She was like my best friend during those childhood years and we used to be close during those years. After many years of wait to see her again, I was finally able to meet her again in the year 2006 when we made a surprise visit to her parents house. She was, what can I say, she is still short and yet still cute as I remember during our childhood days. Moving on, majority of my friends were female and some males during those years. It is maybe because what my mother said “I look like a girl”. During those days, I was very fluent in speaking Malay and Arabic but now at this present day I am not fluent in those languages anymore though I can speak some Malay.
As I move on to another school, where I committed all my education years in that school for all my life, this school was International School Brunei. From grade one to preparatory university course, which is about 14 years of my life I was in that school. And I still have fond memories and bad memories of that school. Upon my arrival in this school, I felt something special, it was like I am committed to this school and like I cannot absolutely leave this school in which taught me something about committing yourself to something that is value of importance, likewise the atmosphere in this school simply gave me the heart to commit my 13 years of studying to this school only. Why did I commit myself to this school? It was because the passion of the teachers there and the feeling of that there was something special about that place that makes you not leave the school.
During Primary years (elementary) from year 1 to year 6, I was introduced to English in which I struggled heavily to understand but with extra schooling in a another school that my parents recommended to which was British Council, in which where I developed my English and gain a British accent like pronunciation after several years in that school. During those years I was active in extra curriculum activities such as the Dance club, Filipino traditional dance club, chess club, basketball club, football club, art club, Chinese art club, squash, swimming club and tae kwan do. I even learned how to play the piano for 4 years in which is required for our school for music class in which I learned how to read notes and such but now I’ve became more of a vocalist than a pianist though I still ’air piano’ whenever a tune of a piano comes on in which I try my best to imagine the keys and play where I think the key is.
I was able to experience many things and as well meet many people as well. I had awards from my teachers during those years, as such a math excellence award, performance award in dance, most organized and responsible awards. I also participated in contests such as math, science and English. As you can tell that I am burdened to do well in my studies as I am an only child I have more responsibility and as well more pressure than anyone in class. I also embarked into a new language which I learned for almost all my life but now I’ve got little knowledge of it, that new language is French.
During secondary years (High School), from year 7 to 11, I was less active in my participation of activities as it was reduced to the football club, basketball club and golf club. As I was taking my studies both not seriously and as well seriously. I gain much little awards during those awards, mainly for information technology, history, math and French. Year 10 to 11, I performed badly in my studies which disappointed me and my parents as I was not focusing on my studies that often that it led to my down fall.
During preparatory-university years from year 12 to 13, this is where I began my rise from my set back during year 10 to 11, I took everything seriously as I do not want to become a failure in my family. In which I received awards for Mandarin, History and Information Technology in Global Society (ITGS). The subjects that I selected was the requirements for IT and Law, which were English HL, History HL, ITGS HL, Mandarin Ab Intio SL, Math Studies SL and Design and Technology SL. And I was once again active in my activities, I led (along with my friend) a beach clean up project in which we aim to clean the beaches of Brunei, I also led and organized a painting and drawing team to paint and draw cartoons on the walls of the pediatric wards, this activity I had the most responsibility and committed to do as I see this to give back for my mother’s work in the hospital in which she is a nurse of. More activities was international debates of which was IASA Model United Nations in Manila, Philippines, BGIC (Borneo Global Issues Conference)IV and V, the musical called Oliver where we sang and danced and as well pre-kindergarten/kindergarten helper which gained me experience of taking care of little children and as well be playful with them, my favorite two children during my time there are Hrio, a Japanese boy, and Natasha, a Chinese girl, both resembled me somehow. The girl resembled my shyness and silence and the boy resembled my playfulness, and as well joining the basketball and golf club again.
Once I was close of getting the award I dreamed of achieving in which I could leave a mark on that school forever, which was the Director’s award but however I was close to achieving that award and was handed to my friend. During my studies in the preparatory course (called the International Baccalaureate Diploma), I achieved and did great things. Mainly my research on a four thousand word essay on Jose Rizal, in which I am the first person to complete with the span of two months of sleepless nights and endless times at the library, as well my extensive hardship in researching truth for my theory of knowledge essay and presentation. And I was known in school as “Crazy Joe”, “The Hard Worker” and “The Role Model”, it is due to my hard work and work ethic in school. I was quoted by my friends as “Inspirational” because when I am compared to the top students of the school in my year group, I am mainly the hard worker, an underdog who is working his way back to the top.
Though those are what I achieved during my school years, but my life was a turmoil of mixed emotions. As such I feel lonely and depressed as often I do, why? It is because I was born a loner and I was the only child in which I never had everything in my life. And as well the amount of peer pressure I felt everyday. My love life is nothing but filled with sadness, where I had five crushes. Three of which I was rejected, one of which my best friend dated her and became officially a couple and then finally one, I could say she nearly became my girlfriend but in the day of valentine’s day she chosen another person over me. After that event, I resolved my love to be hiatus (or a stop) as I do not want to have another downfall in my life and I do not want to get hurt again. And up to now, I refuse myself to fall in love again.
To be honest with myself, I am a lonely person, when I am in my room I spend hours of thinking and letting myself into my lonely self as though I look depressed. Thus, even though I feel lonely I feel glad to have friends, friends I trust on, friends I love, friends I care for and friends I never want them to leave me, because whenever I am with them, I can forget all my loneliness I feel in my life. And I am glad that I have my family even though I hide my feelings of loneliness from them. I always say this to myself “If any of my friends are able to understand this lonely feeling I have, then he or she is truly is my friend and I do not want her or him to leave me alone”.
However, one angers me most is whenever people say “I wish I was a only child”, then I would ask why. Their common reply “So I can have everything I want!” or “So I have no brothers and sisters!”. My response? “You are the most stupidest and most idiotic person I have ever know, never wish that. Why? I am considering you as the most luckiest person to have brothers and sisters and look at me, I have no one but myself. And yes I do get almost everything I want but I do not get everything!”.
When I graduated in the month of June 2007 with a passing grade of 24 equivalent to the A-levels of an A student, I took a year break in which I embark myself to experience many different things I have not tried before. One was singing, in the year September 2006 I joined the St George’s Senior Church Choir, in which I committed myself to sing in front of many people as part of the group and as well sing solo in front of many. I was able to gain valuable experience on getting an insight of commitment is really about, likewise sacrificing yourself for all, sacrificing your time in effort to make a small or big difference. Then in May 2007 I signed up for voice lessons, in which I gained some much experience which was valuable to me, as well proving that I am not tone deaf.
I then embarked myself to learn a language I really wanted learn, which was Japanese. Where I signed up for three months for a beginners course. I was able to added another language to my linguistic knowledge, which are now English (very fluent without a doubt), tagalog (rusty yet trying to improve), French (my French is now very poor as I’ve forgotten many words but still remember the grammar construction of the words), Japanese (a little), and of course mandarin (a little). Learning new languages is like a hobby to me, where I believe that learning languages is a key to understanding people and as well their culture. The languages I would love to learn are Korean (I am currently learning some basics from my friend), Spanish, Italian and German. As well learning kickboxing in the gym to lose some weight but after 6 months I’ve stopped going to the gym and started focusing on my vocalization. I also broaden my knowledge by reading more books, to give myself an understanding and as well improving my English.
After my one year break, I have set my foot on the Philippines in May 2008. Which is the first time in my life that I will be staying here in a very long period of time, because I have spent only two or three weeks vacations in the Philippines only and this is a first time that I will be staying here for a extensive time. Coming here in the Philippines took a lot of time for me to adapt to the environment and the culture, it somehow took me about two to three months to adapt to the way of life here. Why? Even though I have some knowledge of the language but the culture and the way of living is something I still need to understand further because it is completely different from Brunei. Setting foot here in the Philippines gave me mix emotions, in which are homesickness, depression, and joy. Homesick due to the fact Brunei is my homeland in which where I grew up, depression that my friends might forget me and no longer keep in touch with me, and joy of that I will be embarking a new chapter in my life.
As I embark myself to this new journey of my life in this foreign land, to me it is even though I am a Filipino, I have experienced things that are worth mentioning and things I feel that have let down my own impressions of the certain things, this I won’t say as it is completely personal. The things that are worth mentioning is only one important one, ever since I set foot on Our Lady of Fatima University I have made a handful of friends that I can trust and depend on. These friends are special to me in every way that I can forget my loneliness of being in this foreign land, their names? They are Hannah, Justine, Rhea, and Joy. Yes, they are few and they are the most notable ones I’ve met and became friends with but I have in my own way to say that they are great friends to me and I would protect and value my friendship with them no matter what.
My campus life, in which experiencing in campus that if I hang out with a female friend much more often than I do, as in one on one rather than by groups, they are deemed to be couple which is a complete opposite in Brunei where they are either deemed to be close of friends or a couple. And I enjoy my campus life lately with the workload which I missed during my year break and as well the smell of books in the library.
Apart from my campus life, I enjoyed the food here really, local and imported food. And yes, the cafes, I have never seen so many cafes in my life, hence my first café was coffee bean when I was only fifteen drinking a ice blended mocha. Philippines won my heart through their empathic malls and cafes, though some malls are rather disappointing as they remind me of the small mall in Brunei (compared to the ones here in the Philippines). And as well I’m able to bond with my family here, bonding with them to know their positive and negative qualities.
What else is to mention? Why am I here in the Philippines? A Chinese saying is my answer. “Falling leaves return to your roots” a beautiful phrase I learned from reading Adeline Yen Mah’s Falling Leaves. In which we always return to where we belong and relating to me? To me, coming back to a land I have no experience of and as well to continue my path to understanding my nationality.
What does the future holds for me? The future brings either bright or dim, bright that I may stay here for a extensive time or dim that I may transfer upon my decision. But no matter, I am undecided yet and I am willing to commit myself to this university as I feel something special about this university, like the feeling I felt when I was in ISB. It will be hard for me leave as usual. The things I would want to do is to visit many malls that I haven’t visited and travel to other locations of the Philippines I have never been to. And explore the many sites I would love to smell the history and as well the sights that would either give me second thoughts or leaving me breathless. I love to travel to be honest, I love to go places I don’t know of and as well I love to shop as well, shop at the malls I see that are interesting. Even though I’ve been told there are discos or clubs in many areas in the Philippines but I might as well say no thank you, I rather not waste my time in those places in which I would rather travel and mall around the place.
At present time, I am glad to have friends that I trust and they are important to me and I do not want to lose them nor leave me. I am content with my life in the Philippines, the way of hardship and struggle. But there is one thing I know, life is just as the way it is, a bumpy path where you are either rise or fall, you might as well live with life just as it is.
Remember, Just let it be. And just take life as it. And I work with miracles, never with doubts.
Updates:
This week I'll giving my presents to my friends and as well place the gifts for my family under the tree.
Last week was AMS (Allied Medical Sciences) organization week, so it literaly means I have the week off but I decided to attend classes instead over mucking around here and there. And on thursday, I have no idea how many pictures of my KF I took with my camera, in which I brought along in my bag accidently with my laptop. Actually she used my camera and took pictures of herself.
One thing I noticed between me and kf, whenever I take random pictures of her. She doesn't seem to be blocking nor covering my camara or mobile phone camera nowadays. Compared to last four months ago, she would be looking away and avoiding the camara. Now she is happy and okay with it. And also smiles whenver I took a weird shot of her.
Moving on. Many of our lessons, we have freetime...as in no lessons at all really.
This week will be the same because of psychology week. Where many of my psychology classmates will not be there.
So yipee.
That is all =)
Alas, The Loner’s Biography
Born on the year 1989 date of June 15th, I was born through cesarean birth in Bandar Seri Begawan, Brunei Darussalam in the hospital of RIPAS. Is the only child of this current Untalan family. And as well the eldest among the grandchildren of the Ognitas. How big was I? I was small, about the size of a coca-cola bottle. And I was named after a church in Quezon City, which was St. Joseph. With my birth it brought joys to my family of course, joys that they wanted me here. Just to say that, my mother wanted a boy and girl, and when I was born, my mother always tell me this very often she always say “I thank god for giving you as my child, because when I was pregnant of you I wanted a boy and girl but god gave me a son that looks like a girl”. Though it is uncomforting that when I hear that at first but as times pass and I look at pictures of the past, I do, and acceptingly agree, look like a girl. However, among these joys there was sorrow.
From the five attempts of giving birth, I am the only one that survived meaning that my mother had four miscarriages, two before me and two after me. Imagine that, I would have been the middle child of the family if they were born alive but this knowledge of the miscarriages is a scar on my behalf. Why? It hurts really knowing this that I am now forever alone in the family, with no brothers nor sisters when I need support and comfort, and as well the image of a dead fetus is embedded on my brain whenever I think about birth or subject of birth. But even with this sorrow, I know I am lucky to be born unto this world and that I am the only gift of god to my family.
As I grow through my years, I was the silent and shy boy in my childhood. I was playful too. Everyone around me was kind and generous as they are I still remember of them. I still do recall the event when I bit my cousin’s (Ashra aka Star) leg while in line at the sultan’s hari raya visitation. I still do remember the years of my younger days of watching endless Disney movies and cartoons which I became fond of. And I was know as Pooh bear by my parents because he is and still is my favorite character of all Disney characters and as well my size which they say I resemble him.
As I enter kindergarten and reception, I was playful as I was and joking kind yet caused some little trouble to my fellow classmates and teachers. During those years I remember my childhood friend and god-cousin (meaning my godparent’s child), her name was Nikki. She was like my best friend during those childhood years and we used to be close during those years. After many years of wait to see her again, I was finally able to meet her again in the year 2006 when we made a surprise visit to her parents house. She was, what can I say, she is still short and yet still cute as I remember during our childhood days. Moving on, majority of my friends were female and some males during those years. It is maybe because what my mother said “I look like a girl”. During those days, I was very fluent in speaking Malay and Arabic but now at this present day I am not fluent in those languages anymore though I can speak some Malay.
As I move on to another school, where I committed all my education years in that school for all my life, this school was International School Brunei. From grade one to preparatory university course, which is about 14 years of my life I was in that school. And I still have fond memories and bad memories of that school. Upon my arrival in this school, I felt something special, it was like I am committed to this school and like I cannot absolutely leave this school in which taught me something about committing yourself to something that is value of importance, likewise the atmosphere in this school simply gave me the heart to commit my 13 years of studying to this school only. Why did I commit myself to this school? It was because the passion of the teachers there and the feeling of that there was something special about that place that makes you not leave the school.
During Primary years (elementary) from year 1 to year 6, I was introduced to English in which I struggled heavily to understand but with extra schooling in a another school that my parents recommended to which was British Council, in which where I developed my English and gain a British accent like pronunciation after several years in that school. During those years I was active in extra curriculum activities such as the Dance club, Filipino traditional dance club, chess club, basketball club, football club, art club, Chinese art club, squash, swimming club and tae kwan do. I even learned how to play the piano for 4 years in which is required for our school for music class in which I learned how to read notes and such but now I’ve became more of a vocalist than a pianist though I still ’air piano’ whenever a tune of a piano comes on in which I try my best to imagine the keys and play where I think the key is.
I was able to experience many things and as well meet many people as well. I had awards from my teachers during those years, as such a math excellence award, performance award in dance, most organized and responsible awards. I also participated in contests such as math, science and English. As you can tell that I am burdened to do well in my studies as I am an only child I have more responsibility and as well more pressure than anyone in class. I also embarked into a new language which I learned for almost all my life but now I’ve got little knowledge of it, that new language is French.
During secondary years (High School), from year 7 to 11, I was less active in my participation of activities as it was reduced to the football club, basketball club and golf club. As I was taking my studies both not seriously and as well seriously. I gain much little awards during those awards, mainly for information technology, history, math and French. Year 10 to 11, I performed badly in my studies which disappointed me and my parents as I was not focusing on my studies that often that it led to my down fall.
During preparatory-university years from year 12 to 13, this is where I began my rise from my set back during year 10 to 11, I took everything seriously as I do not want to become a failure in my family. In which I received awards for Mandarin, History and Information Technology in Global Society (ITGS). The subjects that I selected was the requirements for IT and Law, which were English HL, History HL, ITGS HL, Mandarin Ab Intio SL, Math Studies SL and Design and Technology SL. And I was once again active in my activities, I led (along with my friend) a beach clean up project in which we aim to clean the beaches of Brunei, I also led and organized a painting and drawing team to paint and draw cartoons on the walls of the pediatric wards, this activity I had the most responsibility and committed to do as I see this to give back for my mother’s work in the hospital in which she is a nurse of. More activities was international debates of which was IASA Model United Nations in Manila, Philippines, BGIC (Borneo Global Issues Conference)IV and V, the musical called Oliver where we sang and danced and as well pre-kindergarten/kindergarten helper which gained me experience of taking care of little children and as well be playful with them, my favorite two children during my time there are Hrio, a Japanese boy, and Natasha, a Chinese girl, both resembled me somehow. The girl resembled my shyness and silence and the boy resembled my playfulness, and as well joining the basketball and golf club again.
Once I was close of getting the award I dreamed of achieving in which I could leave a mark on that school forever, which was the Director’s award but however I was close to achieving that award and was handed to my friend. During my studies in the preparatory course (called the International Baccalaureate Diploma), I achieved and did great things. Mainly my research on a four thousand word essay on Jose Rizal, in which I am the first person to complete with the span of two months of sleepless nights and endless times at the library, as well my extensive hardship in researching truth for my theory of knowledge essay and presentation. And I was known in school as “Crazy Joe”, “The Hard Worker” and “The Role Model”, it is due to my hard work and work ethic in school. I was quoted by my friends as “Inspirational” because when I am compared to the top students of the school in my year group, I am mainly the hard worker, an underdog who is working his way back to the top.
Though those are what I achieved during my school years, but my life was a turmoil of mixed emotions. As such I feel lonely and depressed as often I do, why? It is because I was born a loner and I was the only child in which I never had everything in my life. And as well the amount of peer pressure I felt everyday. My love life is nothing but filled with sadness, where I had five crushes. Three of which I was rejected, one of which my best friend dated her and became officially a couple and then finally one, I could say she nearly became my girlfriend but in the day of valentine’s day she chosen another person over me. After that event, I resolved my love to be hiatus (or a stop) as I do not want to have another downfall in my life and I do not want to get hurt again. And up to now, I refuse myself to fall in love again.
To be honest with myself, I am a lonely person, when I am in my room I spend hours of thinking and letting myself into my lonely self as though I look depressed. Thus, even though I feel lonely I feel glad to have friends, friends I trust on, friends I love, friends I care for and friends I never want them to leave me, because whenever I am with them, I can forget all my loneliness I feel in my life. And I am glad that I have my family even though I hide my feelings of loneliness from them. I always say this to myself “If any of my friends are able to understand this lonely feeling I have, then he or she is truly is my friend and I do not want her or him to leave me alone”.
However, one angers me most is whenever people say “I wish I was a only child”, then I would ask why. Their common reply “So I can have everything I want!” or “So I have no brothers and sisters!”. My response? “You are the most stupidest and most idiotic person I have ever know, never wish that. Why? I am considering you as the most luckiest person to have brothers and sisters and look at me, I have no one but myself. And yes I do get almost everything I want but I do not get everything!”.
When I graduated in the month of June 2007 with a passing grade of 24 equivalent to the A-levels of an A student, I took a year break in which I embark myself to experience many different things I have not tried before. One was singing, in the year September 2006 I joined the St George’s Senior Church Choir, in which I committed myself to sing in front of many people as part of the group and as well sing solo in front of many. I was able to gain valuable experience on getting an insight of commitment is really about, likewise sacrificing yourself for all, sacrificing your time in effort to make a small or big difference. Then in May 2007 I signed up for voice lessons, in which I gained some much experience which was valuable to me, as well proving that I am not tone deaf.
I then embarked myself to learn a language I really wanted learn, which was Japanese. Where I signed up for three months for a beginners course. I was able to added another language to my linguistic knowledge, which are now English (very fluent without a doubt), tagalog (rusty yet trying to improve), French (my French is now very poor as I’ve forgotten many words but still remember the grammar construction of the words), Japanese (a little), and of course mandarin (a little). Learning new languages is like a hobby to me, where I believe that learning languages is a key to understanding people and as well their culture. The languages I would love to learn are Korean (I am currently learning some basics from my friend), Spanish, Italian and German. As well learning kickboxing in the gym to lose some weight but after 6 months I’ve stopped going to the gym and started focusing on my vocalization. I also broaden my knowledge by reading more books, to give myself an understanding and as well improving my English.
After my one year break, I have set my foot on the Philippines in May 2008. Which is the first time in my life that I will be staying here in a very long period of time, because I have spent only two or three weeks vacations in the Philippines only and this is a first time that I will be staying here for a extensive time. Coming here in the Philippines took a lot of time for me to adapt to the environment and the culture, it somehow took me about two to three months to adapt to the way of life here. Why? Even though I have some knowledge of the language but the culture and the way of living is something I still need to understand further because it is completely different from Brunei. Setting foot here in the Philippines gave me mix emotions, in which are homesickness, depression, and joy. Homesick due to the fact Brunei is my homeland in which where I grew up, depression that my friends might forget me and no longer keep in touch with me, and joy of that I will be embarking a new chapter in my life.
As I embark myself to this new journey of my life in this foreign land, to me it is even though I am a Filipino, I have experienced things that are worth mentioning and things I feel that have let down my own impressions of the certain things, this I won’t say as it is completely personal. The things that are worth mentioning is only one important one, ever since I set foot on Our Lady of Fatima University I have made a handful of friends that I can trust and depend on. These friends are special to me in every way that I can forget my loneliness of being in this foreign land, their names? They are Hannah, Justine, Rhea, and Joy. Yes, they are few and they are the most notable ones I’ve met and became friends with but I have in my own way to say that they are great friends to me and I would protect and value my friendship with them no matter what.
My campus life, in which experiencing in campus that if I hang out with a female friend much more often than I do, as in one on one rather than by groups, they are deemed to be couple which is a complete opposite in Brunei where they are either deemed to be close of friends or a couple. And I enjoy my campus life lately with the workload which I missed during my year break and as well the smell of books in the library.
Apart from my campus life, I enjoyed the food here really, local and imported food. And yes, the cafes, I have never seen so many cafes in my life, hence my first café was coffee bean when I was only fifteen drinking a ice blended mocha. Philippines won my heart through their empathic malls and cafes, though some malls are rather disappointing as they remind me of the small mall in Brunei (compared to the ones here in the Philippines). And as well I’m able to bond with my family here, bonding with them to know their positive and negative qualities.
What else is to mention? Why am I here in the Philippines? A Chinese saying is my answer. “Falling leaves return to your roots” a beautiful phrase I learned from reading Adeline Yen Mah’s Falling Leaves. In which we always return to where we belong and relating to me? To me, coming back to a land I have no experience of and as well to continue my path to understanding my nationality.
What does the future holds for me? The future brings either bright or dim, bright that I may stay here for a extensive time or dim that I may transfer upon my decision. But no matter, I am undecided yet and I am willing to commit myself to this university as I feel something special about this university, like the feeling I felt when I was in ISB. It will be hard for me leave as usual. The things I would want to do is to visit many malls that I haven’t visited and travel to other locations of the Philippines I have never been to. And explore the many sites I would love to smell the history and as well the sights that would either give me second thoughts or leaving me breathless. I love to travel to be honest, I love to go places I don’t know of and as well I love to shop as well, shop at the malls I see that are interesting. Even though I’ve been told there are discos or clubs in many areas in the Philippines but I might as well say no thank you, I rather not waste my time in those places in which I would rather travel and mall around the place.
At present time, I am glad to have friends that I trust and they are important to me and I do not want to lose them nor leave me. I am content with my life in the Philippines, the way of hardship and struggle. But there is one thing I know, life is just as the way it is, a bumpy path where you are either rise or fall, you might as well live with life just as it is.
Remember, Just let it be. And just take life as it. And I work with miracles, never with doubts.
Updates:
This week I'll giving my presents to my friends and as well place the gifts for my family under the tree.
Last week was AMS (Allied Medical Sciences) organization week, so it literaly means I have the week off but I decided to attend classes instead over mucking around here and there. And on thursday, I have no idea how many pictures of my KF I took with my camera, in which I brought along in my bag accidently with my laptop. Actually she used my camera and took pictures of herself.
One thing I noticed between me and kf, whenever I take random pictures of her. She doesn't seem to be blocking nor covering my camara or mobile phone camera nowadays. Compared to last four months ago, she would be looking away and avoiding the camara. Now she is happy and okay with it. And also smiles whenver I took a weird shot of her.
Moving on. Many of our lessons, we have freetime...as in no lessons at all really.
This week will be the same because of psychology week. Where many of my psychology classmates will not be there.
So yipee.
That is all =)
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Tagged because I bothered
Answer the questions below, do a Google Image search with your answer, take a picture from the first page of results, and do it with minimal words of explanation. Tag 5 other people to do the same once you’ve finished answering every question.
1. The age you’ll be on your next birthday.
2. A place you’d like to travel to.
Mainly Japan, Korea and Singapore
3. Your favourite place.
The Cafe
4. Your favourite food.
Asian Food =)
5. Your favourite pet.
6. Your favourite colour combination.
Red and Blue
7. Your favourite piece of clothing.
Football Jerseys
8. Your all time favourite song
If You're Not The One - Daniel Bedingfield
9. Your favourite tv show.
10. First name of your significant other / crush.
bleh
11. The town you live in.
Antipolo City, Philippines.....Ironically it looks greener
12. Your first job.
Student-Student Tutor - Free job
13. Your dream job.
Footballer!
14. A bad habit you have.
Two - Worrying too much and Overworking
15. Your worst fear.
Loneliness
16. The thing you’d like to do before you die.
Enjoy Life
Tagged? Anyone who passes by this blog during their freetime
1. The age you’ll be on your next birthday.
2. A place you’d like to travel to.
Mainly Japan, Korea and Singapore
3. Your favourite place.
The Cafe
4. Your favourite food.
Asian Food =)
5. Your favourite pet.
6. Your favourite colour combination.
Red and Blue
7. Your favourite piece of clothing.
Football Jerseys
8. Your all time favourite song
If You're Not The One - Daniel Bedingfield
9. Your favourite tv show.
10. First name of your significant other / crush.
bleh
11. The town you live in.
Antipolo City, Philippines.....Ironically it looks greener
12. Your first job.
Student-Student Tutor - Free job
13. Your dream job.
Footballer!
14. A bad habit you have.
Two - Worrying too much and Overworking
15. Your worst fear.
Loneliness
16. The thing you’d like to do before you die.
Enjoy Life
Tagged? Anyone who passes by this blog during their freetime
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Christmas Shopping And Sick
I've been sick for a week..
And i've done christmas shopping yesterday and today...
I'm sick and tired
damnit
i hate my schedule somehow...
please i need a well earned rest...
And i've done christmas shopping yesterday and today...
I'm sick and tired
damnit
i hate my schedule somehow...
please i need a well earned rest...
Monday, November 17, 2008
Let it be
Let it all be.
Im homesick and kf has been sick for a week...I'm worried obviously...she's suppose to go to hospital today but couldnt...maybe tomorrow..
Im sick too actually..cough and cold...
Im homesick and kf has been sick for a week...I'm worried obviously...she's suppose to go to hospital today but couldnt...maybe tomorrow..
Im sick too actually..cough and cold...
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Today
Today....
I cant find myself to smile,
No one is responding to my text messages...
I cant smile or at least be cheery,
It must be homesickness,
Since my parents are leaving...
I feel homesick...maybe...
I want to cry to be honest,
But I simply cant, I keep myself composed.
That is me.
Composed, I've never cried yet.
Though my heart...
It hurts.
It's painful...
I got a reason to be sad this week..
Please ignore my sad face...
Another sleepless night for me.
Yes, my parents have left.
Homesickness again.
I want to go to Brunei...
I cant smile.
I cant...
It's gonna be a lonely christmas without my parents...
But a cheery one with my friends...
But, yes even though my parents are like that, they are the diamond of my life.
Without them, I wont have been born..
I now my mood would be gloomy this week...
It may affect my friends...
So I'm sorry for them...saddness brought to the campus...
Please, give me time to recover myself slightly...
For now, see you...I will blog again this week.
I cant find myself to smile,
No one is responding to my text messages...
I cant smile or at least be cheery,
It must be homesickness,
Since my parents are leaving...
I feel homesick...maybe...
I want to cry to be honest,
But I simply cant, I keep myself composed.
That is me.
Composed, I've never cried yet.
Though my heart...
It hurts.
It's painful...
I got a reason to be sad this week..
Please ignore my sad face...
Another sleepless night for me.
Yes, my parents have left.
Homesickness again.
I want to go to Brunei...
I cant smile.
I cant...
It's gonna be a lonely christmas without my parents...
But a cheery one with my friends...
But, yes even though my parents are like that, they are the diamond of my life.
Without them, I wont have been born..
I now my mood would be gloomy this week...
It may affect my friends...
So I'm sorry for them...saddness brought to the campus...
Please, give me time to recover myself slightly...
For now, see you...I will blog again this week.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Update
Tired from malling around too much this week...I mean seriously...I am tired from walking around here and there and over the lovely malls.
First of all I am adding two subjects, yes you heard me correctly, which are Soc 1 philippine history and Soc 5 Economic w/ LRT. Yes, you may call me crazy but I love the workload and the pressure I would feel. With pressure there’s success without a doubt in my opinion. Why? When people are under pressure they tend to work better than people who are confident and not under any pressure, and from my working experience pressure is your friend not your enemy. With this pressure you will endure many challenges that awaits you within your future.
Secondly, christmas is soon and christmas shopping comes to mind. Likewise, I would be doing early christmas shopping by now. Buying gifts for some of my friends and cousins. And as well going out would be great but it is different from brunei…why? In brunei all the places and malls are walking distance however here is…um…hectic? it makes every driver who just graduated from driving school in brunei into a state shock in seeing the dangerous driving in the philippines…gives me second thoughts of driving though and even riding a jeepney. Tricycle is fine as long as its closeby though.
Thirdly, i know that I am killing myself by having 8 subjects but all I want to do is follow a philosophy that my dear IB coordinator has advised me over and over again like a tape recorder. Which was “Keep ahead of the bounce of the ball”. Which as stuck to my ethic ever since I did my IB. Likewise, be ahead of everyone never fall back. Or in simpler terms, DO EVERYTHING THAT NEEDS TO BE DONE! why? so you won’t have to bother doing it last minute and go crazy when you need to hand-in your work. And funny how people still do the last minute work ethic which is indeedly wrong.
Anyways, My parents are leaving tomorrow.
Bleh
First of all I am adding two subjects, yes you heard me correctly, which are Soc 1 philippine history and Soc 5 Economic w/ LRT. Yes, you may call me crazy but I love the workload and the pressure I would feel. With pressure there’s success without a doubt in my opinion. Why? When people are under pressure they tend to work better than people who are confident and not under any pressure, and from my working experience pressure is your friend not your enemy. With this pressure you will endure many challenges that awaits you within your future.
Secondly, christmas is soon and christmas shopping comes to mind. Likewise, I would be doing early christmas shopping by now. Buying gifts for some of my friends and cousins. And as well going out would be great but it is different from brunei…why? In brunei all the places and malls are walking distance however here is…um…hectic? it makes every driver who just graduated from driving school in brunei into a state shock in seeing the dangerous driving in the philippines…gives me second thoughts of driving though and even riding a jeepney. Tricycle is fine as long as its closeby though.
Thirdly, i know that I am killing myself by having 8 subjects but all I want to do is follow a philosophy that my dear IB coordinator has advised me over and over again like a tape recorder. Which was “Keep ahead of the bounce of the ball”. Which as stuck to my ethic ever since I did my IB. Likewise, be ahead of everyone never fall back. Or in simpler terms, DO EVERYTHING THAT NEEDS TO BE DONE! why? so you won’t have to bother doing it last minute and go crazy when you need to hand-in your work. And funny how people still do the last minute work ethic which is indeedly wrong.
Anyways, My parents are leaving tomorrow.
Bleh
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Survey thingy from bleep
TEN THINGS ABOUT ME
1. Are you single?
- joseph, say it nice and proud...I AM SINGLE! =D
2. Are you happy about that?
- Maybe....=)
3. Are you bored?
- Hmmmm I see my assignments on the right side of my sofa....and my laptop on my lap...which one?
4. Are you sad?
- *ahem* i have been sad
5. Are you a queen/king control?
- I don't know...maybe?
6. Are you plastic?
- Fake you mean? at times you need to deceive people who are not worthy to be trusted
8. Are you cool?
- I dont need an aircon to be cool, just let the fresh air breezes past by you! *swats fly*
9. Are you chinese?
- Family secret =)
10.Who are you?
- Say waht?
TEN FACTS
1. Initials
– JOU
2. Nicknames
- Jose, Seph, Joe, Joey and HapSeph (this combines my nickname Seph with Happy)
3. Birth place
-In a peaceful hospital in South East Asia, in the golden kingdom of brunei
4. Hair color
- Black
5. Age
- 19 soon to be 20
6. Eye color
- black brown
7. Birthday
- In the middle of june =)
8. Mood
- Busy, helpful and caring
9. Favorite colors
- blue and red
10. Left or right handed
- right hand....i do try left at time....messy
TEN PREFERENCES IN A RELATIONSHIP
1. Smile or eyes
- Smile cheers me up and eyes shows me understanding =)
2. Light or dark hair
- Dark black asian hair =)
3. hugs or kisses
- i dunno....i didnt know we have to choose you know....
4. Intelligence or attraction?
- Intelligence
5. Hook-up or relationship
- errr....i getting a hook up soon...relationship i dont know.....hahaha
6. Trust or love?
– Trust.
7. Long distance or close?
– Long distance shows commitment and close shows we are close but our commitment will be tested =)
8. Call or text?
- Both are great =)
9. Older or younger?
- few months to 4 years younger/older is okay with me
10.Looks or Personality
– Personality must be a first
TEN LAST
1. Last phone call you made
- Who else....my kf =)
2. Last phone call you received
- My KF
3. Last person/people you hung out with?
- KF and cousin
4. Last person to text you
- KF, Rhea, Justine and Joy...all four at once O_O
5. Last person you tickled?
- Does a pat on the back count?
6. Last person you danced with?
- in Dance Dance Revolution, with KF =)
7. Last person you hugged?
- My pillow
8. Last person you ate with?
- Cousin
9. Last person you sat in the car with?
- Cousin
10. Last person you kissed?
- none
Survey done
Who to tag?
anyone who comes by!
1. Are you single?
- joseph, say it nice and proud...I AM SINGLE! =D
2. Are you happy about that?
- Maybe....=)
3. Are you bored?
- Hmmmm I see my assignments on the right side of my sofa....and my laptop on my lap...which one?
4. Are you sad?
- *ahem* i have been sad
5. Are you a queen/king control?
- I don't know...maybe?
6. Are you plastic?
- Fake you mean? at times you need to deceive people who are not worthy to be trusted
8. Are you cool?
- I dont need an aircon to be cool, just let the fresh air breezes past by you! *swats fly*
9. Are you chinese?
- Family secret =)
10.Who are you?
- Say waht?
TEN FACTS
1. Initials
– JOU
2. Nicknames
- Jose, Seph, Joe, Joey and HapSeph (this combines my nickname Seph with Happy)
3. Birth place
-In a peaceful hospital in South East Asia, in the golden kingdom of brunei
4. Hair color
- Black
5. Age
- 19 soon to be 20
6. Eye color
- black brown
7. Birthday
- In the middle of june =)
8. Mood
- Busy, helpful and caring
9. Favorite colors
- blue and red
10. Left or right handed
- right hand....i do try left at time....messy
TEN PREFERENCES IN A RELATIONSHIP
1. Smile or eyes
- Smile cheers me up and eyes shows me understanding =)
2. Light or dark hair
- Dark black asian hair =)
3. hugs or kisses
- i dunno....i didnt know we have to choose you know....
4. Intelligence or attraction?
- Intelligence
5. Hook-up or relationship
- errr....i getting a hook up soon...relationship i dont know.....hahaha
6. Trust or love?
– Trust.
7. Long distance or close?
– Long distance shows commitment and close shows we are close but our commitment will be tested =)
8. Call or text?
- Both are great =)
9. Older or younger?
- few months to 4 years younger/older is okay with me
10.Looks or Personality
– Personality must be a first
TEN LAST
1. Last phone call you made
- Who else....my kf =)
2. Last phone call you received
- My KF
3. Last person/people you hung out with?
- KF and cousin
4. Last person to text you
- KF, Rhea, Justine and Joy...all four at once O_O
5. Last person you tickled?
- Does a pat on the back count?
6. Last person you danced with?
- in Dance Dance Revolution, with KF =)
7. Last person you hugged?
- My pillow
8. Last person you ate with?
- Cousin
9. Last person you sat in the car with?
- Cousin
10. Last person you kissed?
- none
Survey done
Who to tag?
anyone who comes by!
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Someone's Happy
I made someone happy today.
And I feel great.
*BIG SMILE TEETH-BEARING*
=D
No, it's not coffee side-affects, I only had one cup of coffee.
It's just that, I'm happy that I made her happy.
One of the reasons to be glad and be happy about is friends.
Thank god we have friends.
On a darker note....SEMBREAK IS NEARLY OVER!! T.T more like a day left!
Weird fact: My mom loves japanese drama when she was pregnant (me in the tummy). So....NO WONDER I LOVE J-DRAMA AND K-DRAMA! hahaha
And I feel great.
*BIG SMILE TEETH-BEARING*
=D
No, it's not coffee side-affects, I only had one cup of coffee.
It's just that, I'm happy that I made her happy.
One of the reasons to be glad and be happy about is friends.
Thank god we have friends.
On a darker note....SEMBREAK IS NEARLY OVER!! T.T more like a day left!
Weird fact: My mom loves japanese drama when she was pregnant (me in the tummy). So....NO WONDER I LOVE J-DRAMA AND K-DRAMA! hahaha
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Something I had to write part 2
Everytime I hear your voice, I am happy to hear from you
Everytime I see you, I am glad that you are there,
Everytime I'm with you, I am glad and happy that we are together.
May this wonderful friendship last forever,
Let us take risks and face the concequences with courage,
Just don't worry, you are not alone I am with you always.
I'm here to catch you when you fall,
I'm here whenever you need me,
I'm always here with you, you mustn't worry.
I got you,
You got me,
Nothing to worry about this loneliness we feel.
Everytime I see you, I am glad that you are there,
Everytime I'm with you, I am glad and happy that we are together.
May this wonderful friendship last forever,
Let us take risks and face the concequences with courage,
Just don't worry, you are not alone I am with you always.
I'm here to catch you when you fall,
I'm here whenever you need me,
I'm always here with you, you mustn't worry.
I got you,
You got me,
Nothing to worry about this loneliness we feel.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Alone
I again feel lonely, even though with the friends I have. I feel like my darkness is heaping upon my chest. A mixture of emotions, hate and anger, I just don't know myself at times.
It could be that I am indeed lost myself. Lost.
It could be that I am indeed lost myself. Lost.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Lost
Lost by Michael Buble
I can't believe it's over
I watched the whole thing fall
And I never saw the writing that was on the wall
If I'd only knew
The days were slipping past
That the good things never last
That you were crying
Summer turned to winter
And the snow it turned to rain
And the rain turned into tears upon your face
I hardly recognized the girl you are today
And God I hope it's not too late
It's not too late
'Cause you are not alone
I'm always there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When your world's crashing down
And you can't bear the thought
I said, babe, you're not lost
Life can show no mercy
It can tear your soul apart
It can make you feel like you've gone crazy
But you're not
Things have seem to change
There's one thing that's still the same
In my heart you have remained
And we can fly fly fly away
'Cause you are not alone
And I am there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When the world's crashing down
And you cannot bear the cross
I said, baby, you're not lost
I can't believe it's over
I watched the whole thing fall
And I never saw the writing that was on the wall
If I'd only knew
The days were slipping past
That the good things never last
That you were crying
Summer turned to winter
And the snow it turned to rain
And the rain turned into tears upon your face
I hardly recognized the girl you are today
And God I hope it's not too late
It's not too late
'Cause you are not alone
I'm always there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When your world's crashing down
And you can't bear the thought
I said, babe, you're not lost
Life can show no mercy
It can tear your soul apart
It can make you feel like you've gone crazy
But you're not
Things have seem to change
There's one thing that's still the same
In my heart you have remained
And we can fly fly fly away
'Cause you are not alone
And I am there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When the world's crashing down
And you cannot bear the cross
I said, baby, you're not lost
The News
I’m directly annoyed and was in a bad mood the whole day yesterday til before night time. Why? It’s the news of the american bombing on Syria. I mean seriously, America will you ever stop show boating your mightiness? We can already tell that the American Dream has died since the Wall St. Crash in 1929 which was indeedly the first world depression on a economical crisis the world has ever faced. And yet today the year 2008, we are facing a economical crisis once again and yet no one has dared to point out that it’s the american’s fault of this depression. Likewise we cannot avoid the fact that history, in many cases, repeats itself many times as before. So likewise, I hate myself in predicting that before the year 3000 or 3001 that we will indeed be in a crisis which would make the world similar state of the years 1930s which took quite a large number of years to recover from the great depression likewise a approxiamately around 5 years tops.
Anyways moving on with the american bombing, which definately the most absurb action by the americans before Mr Monkey would leave his post. I mean, how could he approve of such action? Attacking Syria (sure syria and america have been in rough times in the past, but now is not the time to be engaging into war since we’re all in good terms of peaceful negeoiations we many countrie. Likewise disarmament and so on.) is an action we cannot accept, hence killing civilians which is definately the wrong thing that America has done since they’ve been doing a protection tactic for civilians over the years since their action toward Iraq, which is again yet to prove Saddam’s nuclear properties in Iraq. Which somewhat disappointment for them, they couldn’t find any.
Moving on now. I’m very much looking forward to the US elections. Why? Change hopefully. Why? I’ve been Anti-American since Bush took over as president. Why? It’s the Obama factor that’s why.
Seriously, I would have been a pro-american BUT look at their actions in the world lately. So now I would go for Mr Obama for president. Because of his charisma and his policies as well which in my perspective will sure do well in america and bring the economic crisis into a brief halt. And I am very much looking forward for this anyways. Because I had enough of The Monkey that is ruining the world.
A slight update from me:
- I am undecided to whether to Transfer back to Brunei after a year or two
- I am now aware that New Zealand is a nice option to go to (Along with Japan, Korea, Singapore and Brunei)
- I am happy today since Liverpool FC is still on top of the league table
- I’m looking forward of going to Baliwag but still I don’t know what time are we going there
- I am going to do early christmas shopping so I’ve been thinking what I should get for people…I already got Christmas cards
- I am looking forward for geology, organic chemistry, and health economics.
That is all. Byes
Anyways moving on with the american bombing, which definately the most absurb action by the americans before Mr Monkey would leave his post. I mean, how could he approve of such action? Attacking Syria (sure syria and america have been in rough times in the past, but now is not the time to be engaging into war since we’re all in good terms of peaceful negeoiations we many countrie. Likewise disarmament and so on.) is an action we cannot accept, hence killing civilians which is definately the wrong thing that America has done since they’ve been doing a protection tactic for civilians over the years since their action toward Iraq, which is again yet to prove Saddam’s nuclear properties in Iraq. Which somewhat disappointment for them, they couldn’t find any.
Moving on now. I’m very much looking forward to the US elections. Why? Change hopefully. Why? I’ve been Anti-American since Bush took over as president. Why? It’s the Obama factor that’s why.
Seriously, I would have been a pro-american BUT look at their actions in the world lately. So now I would go for Mr Obama for president. Because of his charisma and his policies as well which in my perspective will sure do well in america and bring the economic crisis into a brief halt. And I am very much looking forward for this anyways. Because I had enough of The Monkey that is ruining the world.
A slight update from me:
- I am undecided to whether to Transfer back to Brunei after a year or two
- I am now aware that New Zealand is a nice option to go to (Along with Japan, Korea, Singapore and Brunei)
- I am happy today since Liverpool FC is still on top of the league table
- I’m looking forward of going to Baliwag but still I don’t know what time are we going there
- I am going to do early christmas shopping so I’ve been thinking what I should get for people…I already got Christmas cards
- I am looking forward for geology, organic chemistry, and health economics.
That is all. Byes
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Can I have.....
Can I have this dance?
I'm inspired by this song from high school musical 3. Why? It gave me insight of the ballroom dance for pe. And I think me and KF may partner up. I can imagine the dance already and it would be slightly different from the movie. And she knows this song anyways since we watched high school musical 3 together.
the video
The song
Enjoys =)
I'm inspired by this song from high school musical 3. Why? It gave me insight of the ballroom dance for pe. And I think me and KF may partner up. I can imagine the dance already and it would be slightly different from the movie. And she knows this song anyways since we watched high school musical 3 together.
the video
The song
Enjoys =)
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
Should I?
I am being pressured and asked by my parents that I should transfer back to brunei. Since here in the philippines is abit well....too personal to say but expenses has been high lately...not my spending but other kinds of spending.
I am being asked by my parents and relatives whether or not I'm in a relationship with my kf since I've been helping her and planning to go out with in many days. My answer is no. Both her and I have our studies as our priority number one and we are only friends...what more can you ask from us?
I am being told that I'm an annoying person through texting and talking. Sure I am annoying but aren't you suppose to be glad that someone here is actually taking notice? And actually spending time with you? I can be repetitve over my question and reminders but this is what you call annoying? You should be glad that I'm actually reminding you and helping you.
I am being told that I'm in love. In what way? I am not in love. Falling in love right now would lead to my downfall. Sure people may claim its the happiness moments of their life but what if it's your education is on the line? Will falling in love inspire you in a way it could backfire at you when you break up? Tell me now? Being friends is enough right now rather than going further.
I am being told I think too much and worry as well. I've learned over the course of this week not to worry too much which I learned easily. However thinking is my own way. My way to get away of things no matter what. Thinking is my mental awareness of the world without my proper thinking with logic where would I be now?
I am being told that I help too much, sure I help too much but that's my way of caring for people. I love to help as much as I can especially if it's someone who really needs help. Why? It's my nature, you cannot absolutely blame my nature and way of growing up.
This is the way I am, you cannot change some parts of me that has already been embeded. This is me.
I am being asked by my parents and relatives whether or not I'm in a relationship with my kf since I've been helping her and planning to go out with in many days. My answer is no. Both her and I have our studies as our priority number one and we are only friends...what more can you ask from us?
I am being told that I'm an annoying person through texting and talking. Sure I am annoying but aren't you suppose to be glad that someone here is actually taking notice? And actually spending time with you? I can be repetitve over my question and reminders but this is what you call annoying? You should be glad that I'm actually reminding you and helping you.
I am being told that I'm in love. In what way? I am not in love. Falling in love right now would lead to my downfall. Sure people may claim its the happiness moments of their life but what if it's your education is on the line? Will falling in love inspire you in a way it could backfire at you when you break up? Tell me now? Being friends is enough right now rather than going further.
I am being told I think too much and worry as well. I've learned over the course of this week not to worry too much which I learned easily. However thinking is my own way. My way to get away of things no matter what. Thinking is my mental awareness of the world without my proper thinking with logic where would I be now?
I am being told that I help too much, sure I help too much but that's my way of caring for people. I love to help as much as I can especially if it's someone who really needs help. Why? It's my nature, you cannot absolutely blame my nature and way of growing up.
This is the way I am, you cannot change some parts of me that has already been embeded. This is me.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
ECG and so on
First of all my ECG. I've got normal! everyone happy =)
Secondly today, I got my results today! AND I PASS!
General Organic and Inorganic Chemistry 1.75
Filipino 1 1.75
English 2 Basic Communication Skills 1.75
PE 2
Social Sciences/Political Science Phil Gov and Consti 2.00
General Psychology 2.50
General Zoology 2.75
There you go.
Zoology I nearly fail...
So now let me enjoy the sembreak =)
Secondly today, I got my results today! AND I PASS!
General Organic and Inorganic Chemistry 1.75
Filipino 1 1.75
English 2 Basic Communication Skills 1.75
PE 2
Social Sciences/Political Science Phil Gov and Consti 2.00
General Psychology 2.50
General Zoology 2.75
There you go.
Zoology I nearly fail...
So now let me enjoy the sembreak =)
Sunday, October 19, 2008
The Heart Problem
This will slightly disturbing post, as I look back in my family background.
I listen to my grandparents and parents' stories of the history of heart problems that runs in the blood. It is depressing to even to think about it but I must explain it to all to you.
Sadly both sides of my parents has a history of heart problems, my faternal grandmother (bless her soul) I only met her once, she died due to the heart problem but I didn't she had a heart problem. Last Sunday, my dad was crying on the phone. Why? He said my condition reminds him of the death of my grandmother...sadly, it runs in the blood.
Last Saturday, after kf went home after lunch, my grandmother's request to her "I wish both of you would become like brother and sister, because Joseph has almost have no friends here in Philippines". My grandmother asked me does she knows about my condition, yes was my answered. She then tells me a story of my grand relatives, one died because of being concern of a relative's heart attack....imagine that, death by worrying and being concern...
During that week, I discovered by reading articles in the internet. The condition and problem I have is cardiac arrhythmia, sadly I am in risk of a life-threatening stroke, or even sudden death cardiac arrest....it bothered me for two days but I've been advised by the family lawyer and god-son of my grandmother that I mustn't think about it, just live on with you life and tell some of the friends that are dear to you...that's what I did...now I am wishing they don't get too worried, i know it's quite serious but I will be fine.
Now, both my parents have hypertension and grandparents as well have hyperpension....my uncle (youngest brother of my mother) and auntie (middle child of the three) has also hypertension. It does runs in the blood...but mine is different from their's....why? their's high blood pressure...mine is irregular pulsation of electrical current. And to add more to that, I have high blood pressure as well...how great is that?
My grandmother remarked to my mother on the phone last last week friday once knowing my condition. "Of all my grandchildren, why him? He's so helpful and caring. Why him? It is hard to accept that he has this. I've been hiding from him that I am crying when he is asleep, I don't want to show him that I'm weak."
My background....it does leads to this if I'm not wrong with my genetics. It has a high possiblity.
Lord, if this is my suffering. I gladly accept this faith. This is my suffering I accept gladly. I shall suffer through it all now. I pray for my family and friends who have expressed their concern. But when I'm gone...will i be remembered? My wish, when I'm gone, I will remain in their hearts I'll stand by them through it all, no matter what.
Update:
To brighten up this post, Happy 20th birthday to Lin Ji! Oct. 20th
Waking Up
Each time I wake up,
I am glad that I live,
Glad that I am,
To feel,
To see,
To hear,
My family and friends,
Each time I sleep,
I'm afraid,
This could be my end,
To feel,
To see,
To hear,
My family and friends again,
Don't leave my side,
Don't leave me,
I want to know,
You won't leave me,
You won't betray me,
You won't forget me,
Because I love you so much,
I don't want to go,
I don't want to leave,
I need to be with you,
I need to be there,
Through it all,
Saying an unsuspected good-bye,
Is painful.
To all: I wish and pray that tomorrow will be fine and finding out that it's not serious. Because I don't want to go, I don't want to be gone....I just want to say first, I love you guys. I will update you all of what happened...Just promise me this, I don't want you to worry too much, why? Whatever happens, I WILL be fine, no matter what.
Listens to Eminem's When I'm Gone
I listen to my grandparents and parents' stories of the history of heart problems that runs in the blood. It is depressing to even to think about it but I must explain it to all to you.
Sadly both sides of my parents has a history of heart problems, my faternal grandmother (bless her soul) I only met her once, she died due to the heart problem but I didn't she had a heart problem. Last Sunday, my dad was crying on the phone. Why? He said my condition reminds him of the death of my grandmother...sadly, it runs in the blood.
Last Saturday, after kf went home after lunch, my grandmother's request to her "I wish both of you would become like brother and sister, because Joseph has almost have no friends here in Philippines". My grandmother asked me does she knows about my condition, yes was my answered. She then tells me a story of my grand relatives, one died because of being concern of a relative's heart attack....imagine that, death by worrying and being concern...
During that week, I discovered by reading articles in the internet. The condition and problem I have is cardiac arrhythmia, sadly I am in risk of a life-threatening stroke, or even sudden death cardiac arrest....it bothered me for two days but I've been advised by the family lawyer and god-son of my grandmother that I mustn't think about it, just live on with you life and tell some of the friends that are dear to you...that's what I did...now I am wishing they don't get too worried, i know it's quite serious but I will be fine.
Now, both my parents have hypertension and grandparents as well have hyperpension....my uncle (youngest brother of my mother) and auntie (middle child of the three) has also hypertension. It does runs in the blood...but mine is different from their's....why? their's high blood pressure...mine is irregular pulsation of electrical current. And to add more to that, I have high blood pressure as well...how great is that?
My grandmother remarked to my mother on the phone last last week friday once knowing my condition. "Of all my grandchildren, why him? He's so helpful and caring. Why him? It is hard to accept that he has this. I've been hiding from him that I am crying when he is asleep, I don't want to show him that I'm weak."
My background....it does leads to this if I'm not wrong with my genetics. It has a high possiblity.
Lord, if this is my suffering. I gladly accept this faith. This is my suffering I accept gladly. I shall suffer through it all now. I pray for my family and friends who have expressed their concern. But when I'm gone...will i be remembered? My wish, when I'm gone, I will remain in their hearts I'll stand by them through it all, no matter what.
Update:
To brighten up this post, Happy 20th birthday to Lin Ji! Oct. 20th
Waking Up
Each time I wake up,
I am glad that I live,
Glad that I am,
To feel,
To see,
To hear,
My family and friends,
Each time I sleep,
I'm afraid,
This could be my end,
To feel,
To see,
To hear,
My family and friends again,
Don't leave my side,
Don't leave me,
I want to know,
You won't leave me,
You won't betray me,
You won't forget me,
Because I love you so much,
I don't want to go,
I don't want to leave,
I need to be with you,
I need to be there,
Through it all,
Saying an unsuspected good-bye,
Is painful.
To all: I wish and pray that tomorrow will be fine and finding out that it's not serious. Because I don't want to go, I don't want to be gone....I just want to say first, I love you guys. I will update you all of what happened...Just promise me this, I don't want you to worry too much, why? Whatever happens, I WILL be fine, no matter what.
Listens to Eminem's When I'm Gone
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Alas
At last, EXAMS finished and it's Sembreak! woohoo! but...results comes out next week! O_O
And i'm getting my check up including scan this monday, KF coming along.
I have to help KF with her psychology after her math exam...yes I'm her personal tutor for our major subjects and english. She was absent on thursday's exams...so she's taking special exams this tuesday and wednesday. So after her math, I will help her with the psychology bits and pieces, to push her grades up! Not what you're thinking dirty minded lot.
My parents are coming to philippines this halloween Oct.31, and then on Nov. 1 we'll be going to my mom's province along with KF. Nov. 8, we'll be going to my dad's province, kf as well going along.
And then from nov. 3 onwards until my mom leaves, my mom will be willing to teach her tagalog! And me malay!
Yeahs, but after those tutoring we'll go out and mall around. Like we planned of course, go out alot during sembreak! *grins*
My classes resumes this Nov.10, and heck me and kf will be classmates now since I've shift from psych to biology now.
Anyways, I've recovered from my nonsense thinking last night...which disturbed me somehow. So yes, it finally stopped, my mind is at ease now.
Yeas, we got alot of plans to do like that road trip and malling around. Sembreak has never been this good!
Thank god I've recovered from my nonsense thinking otherwise I would be depressed today.
I feel great somehow.
But I must relax and rest up to tomorrow as monday will be my check up day.
So buhbyes!
And i'm getting my check up including scan this monday, KF coming along.
I have to help KF with her psychology after her math exam...yes I'm her personal tutor for our major subjects and english. She was absent on thursday's exams...so she's taking special exams this tuesday and wednesday. So after her math, I will help her with the psychology bits and pieces, to push her grades up! Not what you're thinking dirty minded lot.
My parents are coming to philippines this halloween Oct.31, and then on Nov. 1 we'll be going to my mom's province along with KF. Nov. 8, we'll be going to my dad's province, kf as well going along.
And then from nov. 3 onwards until my mom leaves, my mom will be willing to teach her tagalog! And me malay!
Yeahs, but after those tutoring we'll go out and mall around. Like we planned of course, go out alot during sembreak! *grins*
My classes resumes this Nov.10, and heck me and kf will be classmates now since I've shift from psych to biology now.
Anyways, I've recovered from my nonsense thinking last night...which disturbed me somehow. So yes, it finally stopped, my mind is at ease now.
Yeas, we got alot of plans to do like that road trip and malling around. Sembreak has never been this good!
Thank god I've recovered from my nonsense thinking otherwise I would be depressed today.
I feel great somehow.
But I must relax and rest up to tomorrow as monday will be my check up day.
So buhbyes!
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Will it be still the same?
Will it be still the same?
That is the question, will it be?
Since most of my friends already knows about my heart problem,
And all the family knows about it
And various teachers as well.
I still don't know will it still be the same as it was before?
That you might be concerned and worried about my heart condition,
I know that my heart problem may even kill me (I read further).
It is worrying,
But I want to know will it be still the same between you and me?
My friend?
Will it be?
I wish it will always be,
Let us forget that I do have a heart problem,
And let always as it is.
Why?
Thinking about my heart problem will bring sorrow and darken your days,
All I want you is to be happy and be glad.
Side by side?
Hand in hand?
Always don't leave my side...
And always let it be the same always.
Mini Update: I read further about my heart problem and condition, it can kill me..that's the sad part that I found out.
I have turned full-time vegan overnight.
I cant drink coffee anymore T.T
Everyone (the ones I've told, emailed and who read this blog) is worried...which is bothering me. I dont want everyone to worry about me, I just want it to be like it as always be before finding out that I have a heart problem. Just let it be the same...
KF and I had lunch in my house yesterday after our pilipino exam. Next week or so we might go malling again.
I'm getting a scan after I enroll for second semester, KF might come along as morale support but she has english class T.T
Exams is this week so expect me not to blog within this week.
I'm on diet.
PeeWee the mouse is still alive and I havent thrown the dead frog MeeWee.
Anyways I gotta go.
Ciao...
To friends: Dont worry too much. I'm fine! I'm still me! =)
That is the question, will it be?
Since most of my friends already knows about my heart problem,
And all the family knows about it
And various teachers as well.
I still don't know will it still be the same as it was before?
That you might be concerned and worried about my heart condition,
I know that my heart problem may even kill me (I read further).
It is worrying,
But I want to know will it be still the same between you and me?
My friend?
Will it be?
I wish it will always be,
Let us forget that I do have a heart problem,
And let always as it is.
Why?
Thinking about my heart problem will bring sorrow and darken your days,
All I want you is to be happy and be glad.
Side by side?
Hand in hand?
Always don't leave my side...
And always let it be the same always.
Mini Update: I read further about my heart problem and condition, it can kill me..that's the sad part that I found out.
I have turned full-time vegan overnight.
I cant drink coffee anymore T.T
Everyone (the ones I've told, emailed and who read this blog) is worried...which is bothering me. I dont want everyone to worry about me, I just want it to be like it as always be before finding out that I have a heart problem. Just let it be the same...
KF and I had lunch in my house yesterday after our pilipino exam. Next week or so we might go malling again.
I'm getting a scan after I enroll for second semester, KF might come along as morale support but she has english class T.T
Exams is this week so expect me not to blog within this week.
I'm on diet.
PeeWee the mouse is still alive and I havent thrown the dead frog MeeWee.
Anyways I gotta go.
Ciao...
To friends: Dont worry too much. I'm fine! I'm still me! =)
Friday, October 10, 2008
As it beats
Here is the update from today's check up:
Guys,
I do have an irregular heart beat. The synode and electrical pulse is irregular which affects my brain and other parts of the body because of the blood and elctrical pulses not being able to reach certain areas of the body. Which could sometimes affect my emotions, mood, and focus and so on. I now have to get an ECG and a scan of the heart to find the organic problem and be able to fix the problem which I am hoping through medication not by surgery...pacemaker. The advice I received is to consult my family doctor for further analysis and I have to avoid over tiring myself and too much physical activity...
God help me...
Note: My heart beat is like this: fast then normal and then fast and then normal. Yeasterday was worrying which the nurse and doctor told me today, it was: slow normal fast normal slow. And I have high blood pressure...
I was a happy man today, better than ever emotionally...but health side of things...worries me slightly...Been telling my friends and classmates not to worry, I'll be fine...but will I be?
I'm praying that I am fine.
I don't want to die too soon, no I don't.
I'm still single and never have been in a relationship...
Guys,
I do have an irregular heart beat. The synode and electrical pulse is irregular which affects my brain and other parts of the body because of the blood and elctrical pulses not being able to reach certain areas of the body. Which could sometimes affect my emotions, mood, and focus and so on. I now have to get an ECG and a scan of the heart to find the organic problem and be able to fix the problem which I am hoping through medication not by surgery...pacemaker. The advice I received is to consult my family doctor for further analysis and I have to avoid over tiring myself and too much physical activity...
God help me...
Note: My heart beat is like this: fast then normal and then fast and then normal. Yeasterday was worrying which the nurse and doctor told me today, it was: slow normal fast normal slow. And I have high blood pressure...
I was a happy man today, better than ever emotionally...but health side of things...worries me slightly...Been telling my friends and classmates not to worry, I'll be fine...but will I be?
I'm praying that I am fine.
I don't want to die too soon, no I don't.
I'm still single and never have been in a relationship...
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Possible
Today I have consulted the university's nurse, to check me up. So today I found out that I might have a possible heart problem. It is because my heart rhythm or beat is irregular, meaning its slow and then normal and then fast. It's like not following a proper beat.
So yes, it's worrying. I know. Tomorrow morning I'm meeting the university's doctor, for a proper check up. So now, all I am hoping that you would pray that I don't have a heart problem...because I know my condition is worrying but I don't want to be...you know hospitalized due to this heart condition...So I'm asking from you is just to please pray for me and hope that i don't have a heart problem.
Thanks guys
Note: I hate my gloomy mood just now...now I'm better emotionlly but health wise....i don't think so.
So yes, it's worrying. I know. Tomorrow morning I'm meeting the university's doctor, for a proper check up. So now, all I am hoping that you would pray that I don't have a heart problem...because I know my condition is worrying but I don't want to be...you know hospitalized due to this heart condition...So I'm asking from you is just to please pray for me and hope that i don't have a heart problem.
Thanks guys
Note: I hate my gloomy mood just now...now I'm better emotionlly but health wise....i don't think so.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Old Self
Hello old self, how are you?
I'm good joseph, you?
Quite disturbed but I'm fine,
How so disturbed?
Nonsense thoughts, disturbing dreams, emootions and feelings,
About?
I don't really want to talk about it, I don't my friends to worry about me too much now,
I see,
Well, old self. I kinda miss you,
Really? You miss the loneliness you would feel?
Yes, I do somehow.
The loneliness you felt during IB? when you went so low becoming emotional?
Yes, that. I miss.
So, why don't you come back to me? your old self?
It's depressing if I do.
But you've been talking to me last thursday, if you havent noticed before you talked to kf
I know that, I talked to you. And you were right anyways.
Joseph, I'm your old self. You can come back anytime you want,
No. I don't want to.
But are you happy with your new self? I know you've changed since IB, abandoning me.
I dont know.
Really? Are you sure? You're back to where you thanks to me.
I'm sure I am capable what I can do. Besides, I'm liking my new self so far.
I see, but be sure. You listen to your old music.
You mean linkin park and nickelback?
Yes. that. To keep in touch with me.
Okay, I will.
And stop thinking nonsense things as an advice from your friends and from me. And ignore your bad dreams just like kf said, don't mind those dreams you'll worry even more than you are. And stop worrying her, you talked to her too much about how you feel lately, you'll just worry her you know.
Yes my old self i shall.
Great talking to you.
Yeash. Nice talking to you again.
Remember, I'm within you, you can talk to me when need me.
Yea. See you.
Bye
[This has to be my most disturbing post I've typed, I'm actually talking to my old personality...disturbing yes....]
I'm good joseph, you?
Quite disturbed but I'm fine,
How so disturbed?
Nonsense thoughts, disturbing dreams, emootions and feelings,
About?
I don't really want to talk about it, I don't my friends to worry about me too much now,
I see,
Well, old self. I kinda miss you,
Really? You miss the loneliness you would feel?
Yes, I do somehow.
The loneliness you felt during IB? when you went so low becoming emotional?
Yes, that. I miss.
So, why don't you come back to me? your old self?
It's depressing if I do.
But you've been talking to me last thursday, if you havent noticed before you talked to kf
I know that, I talked to you. And you were right anyways.
Joseph, I'm your old self. You can come back anytime you want,
No. I don't want to.
But are you happy with your new self? I know you've changed since IB, abandoning me.
I dont know.
Really? Are you sure? You're back to where you thanks to me.
I'm sure I am capable what I can do. Besides, I'm liking my new self so far.
I see, but be sure. You listen to your old music.
You mean linkin park and nickelback?
Yes. that. To keep in touch with me.
Okay, I will.
And stop thinking nonsense things as an advice from your friends and from me. And ignore your bad dreams just like kf said, don't mind those dreams you'll worry even more than you are. And stop worrying her, you talked to her too much about how you feel lately, you'll just worry her you know.
Yes my old self i shall.
Great talking to you.
Yeash. Nice talking to you again.
Remember, I'm within you, you can talk to me when need me.
Yea. See you.
Bye
[This has to be my most disturbing post I've typed, I'm actually talking to my old personality...disturbing yes....]
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Two Poems
These two poems I dedicated to KF, see already these two. So ya.
My Promise
This is my promise to you,
Through times when you need help,
I'll be there,
I promise,
Through times you need someone to be there,
I will be,
I promise,
Through times you need support,
I will be,
I promise,
Through times of sorrow and loneliness,
I'm here for you,
I promise,
Through times of joy and laughter,
Let's make it memorable,
I promise,
Through times you are hurt,
I'm here to listen,
I promise,
Through times you need to be protected,
I will protect you,
I promise,
Through all these times,
All of your life,
All of many,
I will promise you,
I'm here,
To be with you,
No matter what,
Why?
My dear friend,
I love you,
I am glad I met you,
I can forget my loneliness and sorrow,
When I'm with you,
This is how much I value,
My friendship with you,
Because I care,
I'm an understanding person,
No matter what,
I'll listen to your problems,
And let me tell you,
Isn't it great to know you've got a friend,
Someone like me to be with you,
Through it all,
I'm with you,
Side by side,
I promise
Glad
Glad and happy I am,
To know and to have,
A friend like you,
I can forget,
All of my loneliness,
All of my sorrow,
As I'm with you,
I no longer have to worry,
No more loneliness,
No more sorrow,
I'm glad I'm with you,
No more to worry,
No more sorrow,
You are with me,
I'm with you,
My friend,
You are my close,
And best friend,
Glad that I am,
Glad I have you,
Glad you are with me.
This next one is called Falling Leaves.
Falling Leaves
As every leaf that falls,
It foretells a story,
A story of it;s life,
Stories that many may not understand,
But few may understand,
The sorrow,
The loneliness,
The joy
And happiness,
Falling very slowly,
From it's mother,
Being free,
Free and gailiently,
In the airm
Twist and turn,
It fell elegantly,
As it fall,
It reaches it's home,
Returning back home,
Where it started,
Home in it's mother's womb,
Back to it's home,
Life will begin anew,
A new life,
A new home,
A new hope
As the saying goes,
'Falling leaves return to it's roots'
That's it!
small update: I got exam! Chem oral, quizes this monday! joy.
My Promise
This is my promise to you,
Through times when you need help,
I'll be there,
I promise,
Through times you need someone to be there,
I will be,
I promise,
Through times you need support,
I will be,
I promise,
Through times of sorrow and loneliness,
I'm here for you,
I promise,
Through times of joy and laughter,
Let's make it memorable,
I promise,
Through times you are hurt,
I'm here to listen,
I promise,
Through times you need to be protected,
I will protect you,
I promise,
Through all these times,
All of your life,
All of many,
I will promise you,
I'm here,
To be with you,
No matter what,
Why?
My dear friend,
I love you,
I am glad I met you,
I can forget my loneliness and sorrow,
When I'm with you,
This is how much I value,
My friendship with you,
Because I care,
I'm an understanding person,
No matter what,
I'll listen to your problems,
And let me tell you,
Isn't it great to know you've got a friend,
Someone like me to be with you,
Through it all,
I'm with you,
Side by side,
I promise
Glad
Glad and happy I am,
To know and to have,
A friend like you,
I can forget,
All of my loneliness,
All of my sorrow,
As I'm with you,
I no longer have to worry,
No more loneliness,
No more sorrow,
I'm glad I'm with you,
No more to worry,
No more sorrow,
You are with me,
I'm with you,
My friend,
You are my close,
And best friend,
Glad that I am,
Glad I have you,
Glad you are with me.
This next one is called Falling Leaves.
Falling Leaves
As every leaf that falls,
It foretells a story,
A story of it;s life,
Stories that many may not understand,
But few may understand,
The sorrow,
The loneliness,
The joy
And happiness,
Falling very slowly,
From it's mother,
Being free,
Free and gailiently,
In the airm
Twist and turn,
It fell elegantly,
As it fall,
It reaches it's home,
Returning back home,
Where it started,
Home in it's mother's womb,
Back to it's home,
Life will begin anew,
A new life,
A new home,
A new hope
As the saying goes,
'Falling leaves return to it's roots'
That's it!
small update: I got exam! Chem oral, quizes this monday! joy.
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
I got tagged
I was tagged by Lin Ji, so ya..
3 golden rules:
• state 15 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself
• The 10 people I tag are then to follow my footsteps and write their own 15 weird things/habits and little known facts
• No tag backs (:
1. Every single life or person has a good-side and a bad-side, and people think to seem I'm annoying but in a nicer way.
2. I respect other religions even though I'm a catholic christian...though I'm religous sometimes...but anyways, I respect people's cultures and religions.
3. I know myself that I always look lonely, shy and depress looking and rarely smiling...but when you get to know me better I'm a quite a cheery person anyways.
4. I like predicting so much that my friends either hates or likes me.
5. To be honest, I'm not this fat as I was younger...though I'm losing weight slowly in a nutritionous way not in a exercise way.
6. I'm a gamer, anime, book and language fan as always. I'm willing to learn as many languages I can. Oh, I love footy too
7. I somehow still talk to myself, when no one is around anyways
8. A smile of a friend always cheers me no matter how bad is my mood is.
9. I have a weird love with frogs at the moment...is it pity or something else due to the fact we're disecting and studying them...
10. I cry by myself when I'm absolutely sad or angry, I never show this side of myself to anyone.
11. I'm secretive if I fart in public places...
12. Music simply defines my mood.
13. I secretly text/sms my friends at night before going to bed...shhhh
14. I have gotten over my fear of talking to females...I'm serious!
15. I'm unusually sleeping to early and always constantly waking up every one hour.
The 10 lucky people
Alvin Lee
Lu Wee
Geokyin
Casey
My pet dog
My dead naked frog
My foot
My spirit when I'm asleep
My sleeping state
Any random person who passes by here
Buhbye.
3 golden rules:
• state 15 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself
• The 10 people I tag are then to follow my footsteps and write their own 15 weird things/habits and little known facts
• No tag backs (:
1. Every single life or person has a good-side and a bad-side, and people think to seem I'm annoying but in a nicer way.
2. I respect other religions even though I'm a catholic christian...though I'm religous sometimes...but anyways, I respect people's cultures and religions.
3. I know myself that I always look lonely, shy and depress looking and rarely smiling...but when you get to know me better I'm a quite a cheery person anyways.
4. I like predicting so much that my friends either hates or likes me.
5. To be honest, I'm not this fat as I was younger...though I'm losing weight slowly in a nutritionous way not in a exercise way.
6. I'm a gamer, anime, book and language fan as always. I'm willing to learn as many languages I can. Oh, I love footy too
7. I somehow still talk to myself, when no one is around anyways
8. A smile of a friend always cheers me no matter how bad is my mood is.
9. I have a weird love with frogs at the moment...is it pity or something else due to the fact we're disecting and studying them...
10. I cry by myself when I'm absolutely sad or angry, I never show this side of myself to anyone.
11. I'm secretive if I fart in public places...
12. Music simply defines my mood.
13. I secretly text/sms my friends at night before going to bed...shhhh
14. I have gotten over my fear of talking to females...I'm serious!
15. I'm unusually sleeping to early and always constantly waking up every one hour.
The 10 lucky people
Alvin Lee
Lu Wee
Geokyin
Casey
My pet dog
My dead naked frog
My foot
My spirit when I'm asleep
My sleeping state
Any random person who passes by here
Buhbye.
Honest
First some updates before going into some emo bits. I passed my chemistry 91/120 +10 since we did a extra hard quiz once so i scored 101/120. And I think I'm one of the highest in the class. *smiles coldly*
English I scored 70/120, pass again....so tomorrow and the day after tomorrow I will find out more results and hoping that they're all passes like the others.
Mom's here tomorrow, so this blog might not be active for some time...but please to try to keep it alive!
Now the emo bit.
Honest
I'm going to be honest with my self,
I practically somehow want to cut ties of friendship,
Though I crossed that out of my list,
As it would be shameful in my act,
As well dishonorable to me,
And not really me to do that too,
I'm going to be honest with my self,
I practically somehow do care,
Caring is good but,
To some extent,
I feel like I'm just annoying you,
I'm going to be honest with my self,
I'm practically a nobody to some of you,
Yes,
You heard me right,
A nobody.
A nobody who doesn't exsist,
Who is there but is ignored,
And excluded,
That's me,
A nobody,
I'm gone.
Nobody
I'm a nobody,
I don't really exsist,
I'm just a mere shadow,
I'm ignored,
I don't really know if you do know that I exsist,
That don't matter,
I don't mind being a nobody,
I'm not here really,
I'm just a nobody,
A mere person you know of,
That does exsist or not,
Let's see if you do care,
If I was to disappear from your eyes,
And die before my death,
Alas,
Death most welcomed,
I'm a nobody,
Does that really matter?
Thus,
I make this as my last sentence to you my friends and family,
I love you,
And good bye,
I'm a nobody,
I don't really exsist in your life.
English I scored 70/120, pass again....so tomorrow and the day after tomorrow I will find out more results and hoping that they're all passes like the others.
Mom's here tomorrow, so this blog might not be active for some time...but please to try to keep it alive!
Now the emo bit.
Honest
I'm going to be honest with my self,
I practically somehow want to cut ties of friendship,
Though I crossed that out of my list,
As it would be shameful in my act,
As well dishonorable to me,
And not really me to do that too,
I'm going to be honest with my self,
I practically somehow do care,
Caring is good but,
To some extent,
I feel like I'm just annoying you,
I'm going to be honest with my self,
I'm practically a nobody to some of you,
Yes,
You heard me right,
A nobody.
A nobody who doesn't exsist,
Who is there but is ignored,
And excluded,
That's me,
A nobody,
I'm gone.
Nobody
I'm a nobody,
I don't really exsist,
I'm just a mere shadow,
I'm ignored,
I don't really know if you do know that I exsist,
That don't matter,
I don't mind being a nobody,
I'm not here really,
I'm just a nobody,
A mere person you know of,
That does exsist or not,
Let's see if you do care,
If I was to disappear from your eyes,
And die before my death,
Alas,
Death most welcomed,
I'm a nobody,
Does that really matter?
Thus,
I make this as my last sentence to you my friends and family,
I love you,
And good bye,
I'm a nobody,
I don't really exsist in your life.
Sunday, September 07, 2008
Small mini but yet long update
Today, I woke up too early from what I expected. I woke up like 4am. So Now it's nearly 6am and I'm blogging.
Today I might go to cafe again but that would depend if they (grandparents) would allow me to go out on a sunny leisure sunday.
I also have to revise for my quiz tomorrow, I have a quiz on the muscular system of the human and frog. I forgot to say that we skinned our frogs last monday. goody goody. haha. actually in the whole class, I'm the only one who hasn't got a mask on and I'm the only one who inhaled the most formulin. Anyways, yea I have to study the muscular system of the frog and human, which is much more worst than the skeletal system...why? There are much more longer words than the skeletal.
A song in mind:
Lost
Michael Bublé
I can't believe it's over
I watched the whole thing fall
And I never saw the writing that was on the wall
If I'd only knew
The days were slipping past
That the good things never last
That you were crying
Summer turned to winter
And the snow it turned to rain
And the rain turned into tears upon your face
I hardly recognized the girl you are today
And God I hope it's not too late
It's not too late
'Cause you are not alone
I'm always there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When your world's crashing down
And you can't bear the thought
I said, babe, you're not lost
Life can show no mercy
It can tear your soul apart
It can make you feel like you've gone crazy
But you're not
Things have seem to change
There's one thing that's still the same
In my heart you have remained
And we can fly fly fly away
'Cause you are not alone
And I am there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When the world's crashing down
And you cannot bear the cross
I said, baby, you're not lost
This is in my mind somehow. It's a really nice and touchy song. It's like, you know, saying you've lost everything even your loved ones. sad song anyways.
My momsy is coming soon!
eep.
haha.
I'll go off for now, I'll just enjoy my leisure sunday up to the afternoon.
So cheerios for now.
Today I might go to cafe again but that would depend if they (grandparents) would allow me to go out on a sunny leisure sunday.
I also have to revise for my quiz tomorrow, I have a quiz on the muscular system of the human and frog. I forgot to say that we skinned our frogs last monday. goody goody. haha. actually in the whole class, I'm the only one who hasn't got a mask on and I'm the only one who inhaled the most formulin. Anyways, yea I have to study the muscular system of the frog and human, which is much more worst than the skeletal system...why? There are much more longer words than the skeletal.
A song in mind:
Lost
Michael Bublé
I can't believe it's over
I watched the whole thing fall
And I never saw the writing that was on the wall
If I'd only knew
The days were slipping past
That the good things never last
That you were crying
Summer turned to winter
And the snow it turned to rain
And the rain turned into tears upon your face
I hardly recognized the girl you are today
And God I hope it's not too late
It's not too late
'Cause you are not alone
I'm always there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When your world's crashing down
And you can't bear the thought
I said, babe, you're not lost
Life can show no mercy
It can tear your soul apart
It can make you feel like you've gone crazy
But you're not
Things have seem to change
There's one thing that's still the same
In my heart you have remained
And we can fly fly fly away
'Cause you are not alone
And I am there with you
And we'll get lost together
Till the light comes pouring through
'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When the world's crashing down
And you cannot bear the cross
I said, baby, you're not lost
This is in my mind somehow. It's a really nice and touchy song. It's like, you know, saying you've lost everything even your loved ones. sad song anyways.
My momsy is coming soon!
eep.
haha.
I'll go off for now, I'll just enjoy my leisure sunday up to the afternoon.
So cheerios for now.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Examtime
It's now going to be exam-week this week, from 2nd September to 6th September. So like always, this blog is going to be abadoned for this week. Maybe next week as well plus a couple weeks since my mom is coming to Brunei next week wednesday night.
Yeah, the blog will be temporarily inactive for this week and maybe for the following weeks depending on the situation.
And Good Luck to Everyone!
Exam Schedule:
2nd September: None
3rd September: Chem
4th September: Psych
5th September: None
6th September: english and then Phil gov and consti.
Zoology will be TBA and extra class might fall on a friday (hopefully not) or saturday lunch after my exam. Pilipino was postponed last week and moved to next week Friday morning.
small update: I didn't go to the cafe yesterday. Decided to take care of my grandmother. And she didnt went as well...why? Yesterday was blazing HOT!
Anyways...
Good Luck To Everyone who might be going into their midterms!
Yeah, the blog will be temporarily inactive for this week and maybe for the following weeks depending on the situation.
And Good Luck to Everyone!
Exam Schedule:
2nd September: None
3rd September: Chem
4th September: Psych
5th September: None
6th September: english and then Phil gov and consti.
Zoology will be TBA and extra class might fall on a friday (hopefully not) or saturday lunch after my exam. Pilipino was postponed last week and moved to next week Friday morning.
small update: I didn't go to the cafe yesterday. Decided to take care of my grandmother. And she didnt went as well...why? Yesterday was blazing HOT!
Anyways...
Good Luck To Everyone who might be going into their midterms!
Monday, August 25, 2008
Sick and Exams
First of all I'm sick.
With a cold. So as I type this post, mucus is dripping down my nose and onto my lips with an awful disgusting taste. Yeash, that sick...I need to eat something hot to balance my hot and cold. So I ate chicken curry with extra pepper, my version of kimchi (veggies with chili sauce) and some spicy korean instant noodles hmmhmm. yum.
Next week I might not blog due to the exams going on.
Excited?
No, because midterms is going to be H***!
Zoology, Chemistry, English are the toughies while phil consti and psychology will be worthy easy goers to help me relief some stress.
My Filipino exam is this Friday morning, it's called the Special Tutorial exam. It's for me and my KF only, yes we're very special foreign students indeed. In which this Thrusday morning we'll be studying together while I help her understand through translating what I know of.
My haircut is like the haircut I had when I took my driving exam last November/December.
Currently I have a quiz tomorrow, english 2 longie. And I hate english grammer....ESPECIALLY AMERICANIZED!! Oh dear gosh.
I really hate doing english grammer again...it's like going to primary or secondary again...like a kid or a teen T.T
Something on my feelings lately:
I miss you,
I really do,
I miss you being next to me,
I miss you being there,
I miss seeing you physically,
I miss talking to you,
It feels empty,
It feel like I'm worthy to live on without you,
I love you, do you know that?
I'm worried about you, do you know that?
I care for you, do you know that?
I'm concern about you, do you know that?
I don't want you to leave me,
Among my darkness,
It's lonely,
You are my light and joy,
You lead me out of my darkness,
I thank god,
I met you,
I'm the happiest man in the world to have met a friend like you,
But the question is,
Would you abadon me?
Would you betray me?
Would you even care?
Tell me,
The answers and I will be glady listen.
Why?
I love you. I miss you. My friend.
Note: No this not a love poem to my KF. And I'm not in love too. It's just something I had to write.
With a cold. So as I type this post, mucus is dripping down my nose and onto my lips with an awful disgusting taste. Yeash, that sick...I need to eat something hot to balance my hot and cold. So I ate chicken curry with extra pepper, my version of kimchi (veggies with chili sauce) and some spicy korean instant noodles hmmhmm. yum.
Next week I might not blog due to the exams going on.
Excited?
No, because midterms is going to be H***!
Zoology, Chemistry, English are the toughies while phil consti and psychology will be worthy easy goers to help me relief some stress.
My Filipino exam is this Friday morning, it's called the Special Tutorial exam. It's for me and my KF only, yes we're very special foreign students indeed. In which this Thrusday morning we'll be studying together while I help her understand through translating what I know of.
My haircut is like the haircut I had when I took my driving exam last November/December.
Currently I have a quiz tomorrow, english 2 longie. And I hate english grammer....ESPECIALLY AMERICANIZED!! Oh dear gosh.
I really hate doing english grammer again...it's like going to primary or secondary again...like a kid or a teen T.T
Something on my feelings lately:
I miss you,
I really do,
I miss you being next to me,
I miss you being there,
I miss seeing you physically,
I miss talking to you,
It feels empty,
It feel like I'm worthy to live on without you,
I love you, do you know that?
I'm worried about you, do you know that?
I care for you, do you know that?
I'm concern about you, do you know that?
I don't want you to leave me,
Among my darkness,
It's lonely,
You are my light and joy,
You lead me out of my darkness,
I thank god,
I met you,
I'm the happiest man in the world to have met a friend like you,
But the question is,
Would you abadon me?
Would you betray me?
Would you even care?
Tell me,
The answers and I will be glady listen.
Why?
I love you. I miss you. My friend.
Note: No this not a love poem to my KF. And I'm not in love too. It's just something I had to write.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Drunk
*hic*
I'm drunk..
*hic*
From..
*hic*
Being online for too long
*hic*...
So many typo mistakes...
*hic*
Bleh
I'm drunk..
*hic*
From..
*hic*
Being online for too long
*hic*...
So many typo mistakes...
*hic*
Bleh
Friday, August 22, 2008
Questions Questions
Okay, these questions are from LW's blog. I'm bored anyways. So after these questions I will update you with what's happened lately and so on.
About me
Birthday:: In the middle of June, the year the berlin wall was torn down =)
Birthplace:: Brunei
Eye Color:: Black
Hair Color:: Black
Height:: 175cm
Weight:: Heavy weight...though losing it slowly through crash diet now
Right handed or Left handed?: Right
Your Heritage:: Chinese and Filipino
My Worst Habit:: Tend to spend too much time on one thing and forget what to do next. Eg: Staying infront of this laptop for long hours and forget that I have chores
Zodiac Sign:: Gemini
Shoe Size:: UK size 9 US size 10
Pants Size:: 40 to 41 inches
Innie or Outie?: Both, I like going out and as well spending my time at home. And I cannot wait to drive soon!
Parents Still Together?: Yes
The Shoes You Wore Today:: Black leather hush puppies shoes that looks like sneakers.
Your Fears:: Abandonment, Loneliness and Being left behind and fear of letting my anger out
Your Perfect Pizza:: Veggie and EXTREMELY CHEESEY
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:: Get a girlfriend? Nope LOL hmm Pass my First and Second Semester and help my new found friends when I can, as well to try to bond a good friendship with them and hoping to last for a very long time.
Thoughts First Waking Up:: 'Why the heck did I wake up at 2:30 in the morning?"
Your Best Physical Feature:: I don't know...maybe...my chinese looking eyes haha I don't know really know
Your Bedtime:: between 9pm and 12pm, dependinn of the day.
Your Most Missed Memory:: I got alot of memories I miss. So basically everything that I missed
MY FAVORITES
Favorite color?: Red, Blue, Yellow and Black
Food?: Japanese, Chinese, Korean, Pizzas, pastas and lazangnas
Sport?: Football, Martial Arts, Golf and basketball
Animal?: depends. A peaceful one would be a fish, and loyalty would be dogs
Ice Cream?: Cookies and Cream
Candy?: At the moment, chewing gums, doublemint
Store?: Any store that sells CDS, books and Anime collectables =)
Salad Dressing?: any would do...they're mostly the same
Actor?: Adam Sandler, Jim Carey, Georgle Clooney and Al Pacino
Song?: Jazz, Ballads, some pop, rock and instrumentals
Number?: 8
Gum?: ummm that's with the candy I think?
Holiday?: Christmass or maybe the long two to three month summer holiday which is soon.
Season?: Summer...BUT I do want to experience Autumn and Winter!
Toothpaste Flavor?: Errr they're just toothpaste..
Radio Station?: None, I got no favorite radio stations....my own music is my radio
Perfume?: I hate perfumes and collonge (spelling?). I really hate it
Scent besides perfume?: The scent of nature is perfect for me....not the waste of course
Body part on the opposite sex?: legs?
FRIENDS AND LIFE
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?: A doctor/Psychologist, I'm pursuing a course in psychology then maybe continue to med...extra years T.T
Which One Of Your Friends Acts The Most Like You?: I don't think I have friends that acts like me.
Who’s The Loudest?: No-one, we're a quiet group.
Who Makes You Laugh The Most?: All three of them. Now in uni, three to four friends makes me laugh
Who Have You Known The Longest?: Alvin Lee and Hamizan
Who’s The Shyest?: I think I'm the shyest =) haha no-one...but if there is now, it would be my KF.
When Have You Cried The Most?: Whenever I feel like crying, I hold it (sometimes tears would come out because I feel emotional at times) but the last time I have cried the most is at June 15 Graduation 2007, I sat alone and cried.
What Is The Best Feeling In The World?: To know that someone actually needs me, To know that I am actually doing something for someone because I care, To thank god that I'm alive and have a handful friend I love and care about.
Worst Feeling?: Someone who does not repay my care and love.
Where Do You Want To Live When You Grow Up?: Was England or USA, but now it's Japan/Korea/Singapore/Brunei/Philippines.
If You Could Change One Thing About You What Would It Be?: Less of a fool in trying to hide my emotions and feelings, hence it's obvious in my body language. And as well try to keep in touch with people but hoping that they won't abadon me...
FINISH EACH SENTENCE
Let’s walk on the: road that leads to our home
Let’s look at the: sky and the beautiful scenery, why? It's so beautiful that you cannot believe how nature works.
What a nice: smile, you made my day alittle brighter.
Where did all the: good old days go?
Why can’t we: be together abit more longer?
Silly, little: person
Everyone has a: secret that is dear to him/her
I am: someone who would be there if you need me, and be there if you are down. Why? I care you know.
HAVE YOU EVER
Been In Love?: I cannot comment on that...I'm not in love right now
Been Rejected?: In crushes and so forth, yes, other things, yes.
Ran Away From Home?: I have thought about it once. But I just can't leave home...I feel empty if I don't have a home
Pictured Your Crush Naked?: No
Skipped School?: Nope, and will never do.
Thought About Suicide?: in times when I'm in deep dperession..maybe but no
Slept Outside?: Nope, only with relatives' place.
Laughed So Hard You Cried?: Always.
Cried In School?: I think have...twice or trice..I Dunno
Thrown Up In School?: Nope...but I have DONE ONE EMBARSSING THING!
Wanted To Be a Model?: *bleep* no
Cheated On Someone?: Who in the right mind would cheat on someone
Done Something Really Stupid That You Still Laugh At Today?: Yeash
Seen A Dead Body?: Yeash
Been Bitched Out?: what?
Drank Alcohol?: Red-wine, champagne, vodka and beer...small sips but I don't drink ever since that hangover.
Smoked?: nope...unless you want to end up like my dad in the year 2001 or 1999?
Been On Drugs?: Medicinial drugs that helps with my flu, fever, colds and coughs.
Eaten Sushi?: Always...now I miss them so much
Been On Stage?: Quite alot of times...
Shoplifted?: Accidentally...and wasn't caught..
Been Drunk?: If I drink a fizzy drink now, I get drunk. and i have been drunk once or twice..
Been Beaten Up?: Me, strong boy, me never get beaten up. haha. Well does sparring counts?
DO YOU
Swear?: I do sometimes...Only when frustrated
Sing Well?: Ballad, Vocals and Jazz....I've been told I got a golden voice -_-" odd.
Shower Daily?: Obviously
Want To Go To College?: In college, and heck I'm lovin' the workload
Want To Get Married?: Not now, in the next 5 to 7 years then maybe if I find my soulmate.
Believe In Yourself?: Yes but when it gets grim then no.
Get Motion Sickness?: at times.
Think You Are Attractive?: I hope and I don't know...
Get Along With Your Parents?: Yeash. . . .
Like Thunderstorms?: Sweet roaring thunders....only annoying if they hit the electricity plant and causes a blackout.
Play An Instrument?: used to play the piano...now no
Own An IPOD?: IPOD shuffle and sony walkman
Pray?: Yes
Sleep With Stuffed Animals?: Nope
Keep A Journal/Diary?: a journal that I write on yes.
Dance In The Rain?: I walk, not dance.
Sing In The Shower?: Always...as same as talking to myself in the shower when I'm thinking.
THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke?: Neither
McDonald’s or Burger King?: Neither
Single or Group Dates?: Single
Chocolate or Vanilla?: Both
Strawberries or Blueberries?: Strawberries.
Meat or Veggies?: Veggies more.
TV or Movie?: Depends really.
Guitar or Drums?: Both?
Adidas or Nike?: Adidas for footy, Nike for bags and basketball
Chinese or Mexican?: Chinese
Cheerios or Corn Flakes?: Neither
Cake or Pie?: Both
MTV or VH1?: Only if they're showing music not those stupid shows
Blind or Deaf?: Neither
CAN YOU
Do The Splits?: nearly split...
Write With Both Hands?: I can but lefty not so perfect.
Whistle?: Yeash
Blow A Bubble?: Yeash
Roll Your Tongue In A Circle?: Yeash
Cross Your Eyes?: Yeash
Walk With Your Toes Curled?: Tried it...it hurts
Touch Your Tongue to Your Nose?: almost.
Dance?: ballroom or the waltz
Eat Whatever You Want And Not Worry?: depends really.
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON
You Touched:: one of my classmates...
You Talked To On The Phone:: Cousin
You Instant Messaged:: Lin Ji last night...and Mom too
You Hugged:: Grandma
You Yelled At:: when I was arguing with someone
You Played A Sport With:: cousin.
WHAT’S THE LAST
Time You Laughed?: Just now in the morning and now while watching football funny goals
Time You Cried?: last night while listening to sad songs..
Movie You Watched?: The Terminal
Flavor Of Gum You Chewed?: Doublemint
Joke You Told?: I do tell jokes but I don't recall any
Song You’ve Sung?: in the morning infront of my KF and tutor (because our Pil tuor asked me to sing again), More Than Word by the Extreme. Recently are two korean songs that was given to me.
RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT
Where Are You?: In the living room, number two, near the study room
What Can You See Out Your Window?: the car and some houses..
Are You Listening To Music?: Yes, always
What Are You Wearing?: sleeveless tshirt and shorts and flip-flops
What’s On Your Mousepad?: I use a laptop
BELIEFS
Do you believe there is life on other planets?: maybe but too many conspiracies and media is too dramatic to be trusted at times.
Do you believe in miracles?: Yes
Magic?: they're not true
Love at first sight?: maybe.
Ghosts?: Hmm
Santa?: I'm fat, does that count?
Evolution?: hmm that would depend on how well the monkey does in my test.
IN A GIRL
Fav Eye Color:: Black
Fav Hair Color:: Black
Short or Long Hair:: Long Hair...
Height:: about my shoulder or my height.
Weight:: it would depend though..
Best Clothing Style:: Casual is always best, not too exposed...if you get what I mean.
IN A GUY (I will leave this blank...)
Fav Eye Color::
Fav Hair Color::
Short or Long Hair::
Height::
Weight::
Best Clothing Style::
RANDOM
What Country Would You Most Like To Visit?: Liverpool, England. Tokyo, Japan. Seoul, South Korea. Beijing, China. Singapore.
Number Of CD’s I Own:: I do have lots of CDS but now I use torrent
How many pillows do you sleep with?: two pillows
Do you drink milk?: Yes
Person You Hate Most:: People spreading false information.
How many rings until you answer the phone?: As soon as possible.
What is something scientists need to invent?: When will you stop?
Are you a health freak?: now...I'm just dieting.
If you could travel into space, where would you go?: Earth is home.
What is the worst weather?: Any will do...exclude typoons and disasterous weathers.
Did you play with Barbies as a child?: I'm a straight guy...and heck no.
How many grades have you failed?: one or two in my past.
Updates:
Today, I woke up 2:30am automatically.
Weird yes.
But heck, I did sleep again but woke up again.
And yea today was quite close of being bad.
Tutorial/Class,
I sang again. Upon the request of our tutor.
"Yes, I know that song" she said.
I sang a ballad. So yea. Because we're talking about our Listening is important in communication...In tagalog...I'm the trranslator.
Then Chem, was hell. We did chemical formulas quiz. I barely pass it.
Then while fixing my classmate/friend's laptop.
My gay classmate wrote "[my name] loves [her/KF name]" on the greenboard/blackboard...it's green by the way.
annoyed. I rubbed the writing with a smile.
Then moving on with chem, I got extra 10 points. Because I got the answer right for the problem!
So now. I'm now entering a 3 day holiday with only one assignment (english) and no research papers to do but I have to help my KF with hers and as well revise with her for our exam next friday morning.
I'm literally FREE. But I have quizes coming at me!
Joy.
Anyways, I go.
I'm nearly recovered from my depression. Abit more then I'm back up again.
About me
Birthday:: In the middle of June, the year the berlin wall was torn down =)
Birthplace:: Brunei
Eye Color:: Black
Hair Color:: Black
Height:: 175cm
Weight:: Heavy weight...though losing it slowly through crash diet now
Right handed or Left handed?: Right
Your Heritage:: Chinese and Filipino
My Worst Habit:: Tend to spend too much time on one thing and forget what to do next. Eg: Staying infront of this laptop for long hours and forget that I have chores
Zodiac Sign:: Gemini
Shoe Size:: UK size 9 US size 10
Pants Size:: 40 to 41 inches
Innie or Outie?: Both, I like going out and as well spending my time at home. And I cannot wait to drive soon!
Parents Still Together?: Yes
The Shoes You Wore Today:: Black leather hush puppies shoes that looks like sneakers.
Your Fears:: Abandonment, Loneliness and Being left behind and fear of letting my anger out
Your Perfect Pizza:: Veggie and EXTREMELY CHEESEY
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:: Get a girlfriend? Nope LOL hmm Pass my First and Second Semester and help my new found friends when I can, as well to try to bond a good friendship with them and hoping to last for a very long time.
Thoughts First Waking Up:: 'Why the heck did I wake up at 2:30 in the morning?"
Your Best Physical Feature:: I don't know...maybe...my chinese looking eyes haha I don't know really know
Your Bedtime:: between 9pm and 12pm, dependinn of the day.
Your Most Missed Memory:: I got alot of memories I miss. So basically everything that I missed
MY FAVORITES
Favorite color?: Red, Blue, Yellow and Black
Food?: Japanese, Chinese, Korean, Pizzas, pastas and lazangnas
Sport?: Football, Martial Arts, Golf and basketball
Animal?: depends. A peaceful one would be a fish, and loyalty would be dogs
Ice Cream?: Cookies and Cream
Candy?: At the moment, chewing gums, doublemint
Store?: Any store that sells CDS, books and Anime collectables =)
Salad Dressing?: any would do...they're mostly the same
Actor?: Adam Sandler, Jim Carey, Georgle Clooney and Al Pacino
Song?: Jazz, Ballads, some pop, rock and instrumentals
Number?: 8
Gum?: ummm that's with the candy I think?
Holiday?: Christmass or maybe the long two to three month summer holiday which is soon.
Season?: Summer...BUT I do want to experience Autumn and Winter!
Toothpaste Flavor?: Errr they're just toothpaste..
Radio Station?: None, I got no favorite radio stations....my own music is my radio
Perfume?: I hate perfumes and collonge (spelling?). I really hate it
Scent besides perfume?: The scent of nature is perfect for me....not the waste of course
Body part on the opposite sex?: legs?
FRIENDS AND LIFE
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?: A doctor/Psychologist, I'm pursuing a course in psychology then maybe continue to med...extra years T.T
Which One Of Your Friends Acts The Most Like You?: I don't think I have friends that acts like me.
Who’s The Loudest?: No-one, we're a quiet group.
Who Makes You Laugh The Most?: All three of them. Now in uni, three to four friends makes me laugh
Who Have You Known The Longest?: Alvin Lee and Hamizan
Who’s The Shyest?: I think I'm the shyest =) haha no-one...but if there is now, it would be my KF.
When Have You Cried The Most?: Whenever I feel like crying, I hold it (sometimes tears would come out because I feel emotional at times) but the last time I have cried the most is at June 15 Graduation 2007, I sat alone and cried.
What Is The Best Feeling In The World?: To know that someone actually needs me, To know that I am actually doing something for someone because I care, To thank god that I'm alive and have a handful friend I love and care about.
Worst Feeling?: Someone who does not repay my care and love.
Where Do You Want To Live When You Grow Up?: Was England or USA, but now it's Japan/Korea/Singapore/Brunei/Philippines.
If You Could Change One Thing About You What Would It Be?: Less of a fool in trying to hide my emotions and feelings, hence it's obvious in my body language. And as well try to keep in touch with people but hoping that they won't abadon me...
FINISH EACH SENTENCE
Let’s walk on the: road that leads to our home
Let’s look at the: sky and the beautiful scenery, why? It's so beautiful that you cannot believe how nature works.
What a nice: smile, you made my day alittle brighter.
Where did all the: good old days go?
Why can’t we: be together abit more longer?
Silly, little: person
Everyone has a: secret that is dear to him/her
I am: someone who would be there if you need me, and be there if you are down. Why? I care you know.
HAVE YOU EVER
Been In Love?: I cannot comment on that...I'm not in love right now
Been Rejected?: In crushes and so forth, yes, other things, yes.
Ran Away From Home?: I have thought about it once. But I just can't leave home...I feel empty if I don't have a home
Pictured Your Crush Naked?: No
Skipped School?: Nope, and will never do.
Thought About Suicide?: in times when I'm in deep dperession..maybe but no
Slept Outside?: Nope, only with relatives' place.
Laughed So Hard You Cried?: Always.
Cried In School?: I think have...twice or trice..I Dunno
Thrown Up In School?: Nope...but I have DONE ONE EMBARSSING THING!
Wanted To Be a Model?: *bleep* no
Cheated On Someone?: Who in the right mind would cheat on someone
Done Something Really Stupid That You Still Laugh At Today?: Yeash
Seen A Dead Body?: Yeash
Been Bitched Out?: what?
Drank Alcohol?: Red-wine, champagne, vodka and beer...small sips but I don't drink ever since that hangover.
Smoked?: nope...unless you want to end up like my dad in the year 2001 or 1999?
Been On Drugs?: Medicinial drugs that helps with my flu, fever, colds and coughs.
Eaten Sushi?: Always...now I miss them so much
Been On Stage?: Quite alot of times...
Shoplifted?: Accidentally...and wasn't caught..
Been Drunk?: If I drink a fizzy drink now, I get drunk. and i have been drunk once or twice..
Been Beaten Up?: Me, strong boy, me never get beaten up. haha. Well does sparring counts?
DO YOU
Swear?: I do sometimes...Only when frustrated
Sing Well?: Ballad, Vocals and Jazz....I've been told I got a golden voice -_-" odd.
Shower Daily?: Obviously
Want To Go To College?: In college, and heck I'm lovin' the workload
Want To Get Married?: Not now, in the next 5 to 7 years then maybe if I find my soulmate.
Believe In Yourself?: Yes but when it gets grim then no.
Get Motion Sickness?: at times.
Think You Are Attractive?: I hope and I don't know...
Get Along With Your Parents?: Yeash. . . .
Like Thunderstorms?: Sweet roaring thunders....only annoying if they hit the electricity plant and causes a blackout.
Play An Instrument?: used to play the piano...now no
Own An IPOD?: IPOD shuffle and sony walkman
Pray?: Yes
Sleep With Stuffed Animals?: Nope
Keep A Journal/Diary?: a journal that I write on yes.
Dance In The Rain?: I walk, not dance.
Sing In The Shower?: Always...as same as talking to myself in the shower when I'm thinking.
THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke?: Neither
McDonald’s or Burger King?: Neither
Single or Group Dates?: Single
Chocolate or Vanilla?: Both
Strawberries or Blueberries?: Strawberries.
Meat or Veggies?: Veggies more.
TV or Movie?: Depends really.
Guitar or Drums?: Both?
Adidas or Nike?: Adidas for footy, Nike for bags and basketball
Chinese or Mexican?: Chinese
Cheerios or Corn Flakes?: Neither
Cake or Pie?: Both
MTV or VH1?: Only if they're showing music not those stupid shows
Blind or Deaf?: Neither
CAN YOU
Do The Splits?: nearly split...
Write With Both Hands?: I can but lefty not so perfect.
Whistle?: Yeash
Blow A Bubble?: Yeash
Roll Your Tongue In A Circle?: Yeash
Cross Your Eyes?: Yeash
Walk With Your Toes Curled?: Tried it...it hurts
Touch Your Tongue to Your Nose?: almost.
Dance?: ballroom or the waltz
Eat Whatever You Want And Not Worry?: depends really.
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON
You Touched:: one of my classmates...
You Talked To On The Phone:: Cousin
You Instant Messaged:: Lin Ji last night...and Mom too
You Hugged:: Grandma
You Yelled At:: when I was arguing with someone
You Played A Sport With:: cousin.
WHAT’S THE LAST
Time You Laughed?: Just now in the morning and now while watching football funny goals
Time You Cried?: last night while listening to sad songs..
Movie You Watched?: The Terminal
Flavor Of Gum You Chewed?: Doublemint
Joke You Told?: I do tell jokes but I don't recall any
Song You’ve Sung?: in the morning infront of my KF and tutor (because our Pil tuor asked me to sing again), More Than Word by the Extreme. Recently are two korean songs that was given to me.
RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT
Where Are You?: In the living room, number two, near the study room
What Can You See Out Your Window?: the car and some houses..
Are You Listening To Music?: Yes, always
What Are You Wearing?: sleeveless tshirt and shorts and flip-flops
What’s On Your Mousepad?: I use a laptop
BELIEFS
Do you believe there is life on other planets?: maybe but too many conspiracies and media is too dramatic to be trusted at times.
Do you believe in miracles?: Yes
Magic?: they're not true
Love at first sight?: maybe.
Ghosts?: Hmm
Santa?: I'm fat, does that count?
Evolution?: hmm that would depend on how well the monkey does in my test.
IN A GIRL
Fav Eye Color:: Black
Fav Hair Color:: Black
Short or Long Hair:: Long Hair...
Height:: about my shoulder or my height.
Weight:: it would depend though..
Best Clothing Style:: Casual is always best, not too exposed...if you get what I mean.
IN A GUY (I will leave this blank...)
Fav Eye Color::
Fav Hair Color::
Short or Long Hair::
Height::
Weight::
Best Clothing Style::
RANDOM
What Country Would You Most Like To Visit?: Liverpool, England. Tokyo, Japan. Seoul, South Korea. Beijing, China. Singapore.
Number Of CD’s I Own:: I do have lots of CDS but now I use torrent
How many pillows do you sleep with?: two pillows
Do you drink milk?: Yes
Person You Hate Most:: People spreading false information.
How many rings until you answer the phone?: As soon as possible.
What is something scientists need to invent?: When will you stop?
Are you a health freak?: now...I'm just dieting.
If you could travel into space, where would you go?: Earth is home.
What is the worst weather?: Any will do...exclude typoons and disasterous weathers.
Did you play with Barbies as a child?: I'm a straight guy...and heck no.
How many grades have you failed?: one or two in my past.
Updates:
Today, I woke up 2:30am automatically.
Weird yes.
But heck, I did sleep again but woke up again.
And yea today was quite close of being bad.
Tutorial/Class,
I sang again. Upon the request of our tutor.
"Yes, I know that song" she said.
I sang a ballad. So yea. Because we're talking about our Listening is important in communication...In tagalog...I'm the trranslator.
Then Chem, was hell. We did chemical formulas quiz. I barely pass it.
Then while fixing my classmate/friend's laptop.
My gay classmate wrote "[my name] loves [her/KF name]" on the greenboard/blackboard...it's green by the way.
annoyed. I rubbed the writing with a smile.
Then moving on with chem, I got extra 10 points. Because I got the answer right for the problem!
So now. I'm now entering a 3 day holiday with only one assignment (english) and no research papers to do but I have to help my KF with hers and as well revise with her for our exam next friday morning.
I'm literally FREE. But I have quizes coming at me!
Joy.
Anyways, I go.
I'm nearly recovered from my depression. Abit more then I'm back up again.
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